I read an Alanon devotion today that said, an expectation is a gurenteed resentment.
Ths reminds me of something my T said, "I sense that a lot of your anger stems from expecting her to be who she is not.".
I have a son and just for today we have each other and that is all any of us really have.
Be there for you kid, JRG. And work on being as healthy as you can. Though my Ex is high functioning, there are a lot of subtle behaviors which are damaging, despite her new found self awareness. Many people have told me that I need to take care of myself better, as I am the best chance of the kids turning out ok. My Ex and her FOO are a lot of inertia to overcome. To be honest, I have FOO issues, too.