Hello
Thank you for your responses!
It must be so hard,
1stTimer, to see how she didn't look back! That's some kind of pain one can't explain, feeling so replaced!
But may I ask what do you mean you didn't find it special? Or did I get it wrong? Why would you want something back that hasn't been special? Just wondering
Such Magic moments as you described that one is what I miss. I didn't have this with the guy I met after my ex although he tried so hard to turn this into something serious.
By the way I'm not sure if the friendship will work out so well. He is inviting me over for a night but is not ready to go out for a drink in the afternoon in his holidays - so you see he wants a partner, he is not looking for friendship and doesn't seem to put a lot of value on seeing me outside his bed... .
I miss having someone around but I must say, letting go of him is easy for me compared to the break up with my ex – although we have seen each other for a while and more often than I’ve seen my ex in this one year long distance relationship.
Someone who can detach that easily doesn't feel right for me, I really think about going out on dates again and finding someone who will make it feel special as he did. I hope I will feel strong enough to do this soon without being a burden for anyone I meet. Might be good for me to see there are other nice men out there.
Also thank you for sharing your story with me! I'll go and read it in a calm minute
Hey
spacecadet! I agree with you that friendship and trust are so important! At the same time I also think you need strong feelings in the beginning – feelings you will remember when things get tough, which will make you stay because you know how good the good times were. I don’t think I’d ever go for an “okay”-relationship. I know I could have those easily, but it might be part of my nature that I’m rather on my own than with people who I don’t 100% connect with. I want something real and big.
I’m an absolute introvert, I’d say – with a crazy humour. I’d really love to be with someone who is a bit like me. Who I can laugh with and spend time alone with, really enjoy the time with and also have deep meaningful conversations.
Yes, I think he is high functioning, working 5 days a week, trying his best to be independent while being in great pain.
Thank you so much for your advice and for taking time to understand and help me, “mama”
Update My job is safe now, all exams are passed and that makes things easier for me as I really can focus on handling my emotions now and don’t feel like having to manage a thousand things at once.
I can’t tell if I really am getting better or if it’s just him pulling me up, with interacting positively… After there were a few days we have barely been talking, things feel much better again between us.
He still is not talking a lot compared to the time we have been together, but he is supportive in his messages – well, didn’t think of wishing me good luck for my last exam, but then said he was proud of me, likes my social media posts/comments on them without me asking for it. It seems like he really cares about me and does everything you can expect from a long-distance friendship.
I am supporting him back as much as I can, show him that I care. I’d actually love to talk all day long, but keep the amount of messaging as much as he is ready for – no texting if he hasn’t answered.
Sometimes he is sending virtual hugs over, rare little hearts and it’s not only me anymore reminiscing about good relationship memories
We are joking a lot and I feel less anxious the more we are talking – at the same time I am really afraid because I know that things can turn into another direction fast.
I feel like it’s still too early to ask him if we could see each other. Hope things will keep developing positively, so that I can do this soon.
What I’m hoping is that he’s taking his time to trust me more again. That his feelings for me are still there and that we can rebuild things over time.
Nothing new about the rebound – only that he keeps sharing things about “not looking for the one yet” on the social media sites I am not blocked on, while they are still in a relationship on the Facebook pages he thinks I can’t see.
If they really are still together, he doesn’t seem really committed, I’d say… I must say if I was in a relationship with him, it would not feel alright for me if he texted his ex or any other friend the way he is texting me.
I think I’m doing well. Opinions and suggestions how to do things better, in communication with him, in connecting with him maybe, are always welcome!
Thanks for the amazing help and support I’m getting on here
