PrincessPR
 Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 8
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« on: February 13, 2019, 11:13:23 PM » |
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I have never dealt with someone with this disorder. He is older (65) and I just turned 51, we have known each other 30 years. He was always smitten with me years ago. We lost touch, and found each other 2 years ago. He had been seperated from his wife for about 4 months when we seen each other at a funeral. A friend told me, you know he is getting a divorce, I said no. I am not here to hook up with anyone. When he heard my name, and seen me, his face lit up, and he immediately came and hugged me. It was like time had not passed, and we immediately started talking. We had not seen each other in 15-20 years. We were friends on FB, but he was married and did not post much. I really didn't know he was there.I was living in south Florida 7 hours from him. When I returned home, I got busy downloading the videos and pictures. So I messaged him on FB because that was the only way I knew how to reach him. I told him that I was going to put it on a CD for him. We started chatting, I was uncomfortable because he was married. I did not hear that out of his mouth, so I told him I was uncomfortable. He then told me his version, she had moved out in September and it was almost Feb. My girlfriend told me in fact he was in the process of getting a divorce. I told him this, and he said that she had threatened but had been gone for many months. He had bi-weekly visits.That following Sunday, he had his children, and was in fact served papers.So I was more at ease chatting, every morning I would wake up(3:30am). get coffee sit out on my lanai. I lived in the swamps of So Florida. We would message each other, saying good morning. We were actually getting to know one another, more personably. In the past he would always come sit with me, and talk always. When he was served he stated in his eyes, he was divorced already, and free to do what he wanted. Because I was uncomfortable. He was kinda depressed, because he was 62 then, and had been with this person almost 20 years. I said you will be fine you will just have to start dating when your ready. My daughter has never seen me in a real relationship. I had no men in our home ever, since she was 6mos old.
He then said, how do I date at 62 I don't know how. We finally got past talking about roosters at his place and cows at mine making noises. Our talks progressed, to wanting to know our likes dislikes, and what made us what we are today how life had brought us to where we were. He apparently had been paying attention to me, because he knew that I moved up north and back again. So we chatted abotu that, he never left that crappy place, that is 2 hours north of where I live now. He told me it was awkward dating he didn't know how you really ask women out, he said it just always kinda happened. Pick them up and hang out for a while.
Then one morning, he said to me very sweet, and I could tell he was nervous. He says PR, there is a poker run coming up in a couple weeks. Would you go out on a date with me to it? I was like awwww, he was so formal and very sincere like a school boy. My reply was, of course WW, what is it? I said, well I can get a motel room, because he had told me he was embarassed by his home. His ex~ to be was a hoarder he said, he never allowed anyone to come to his home in many years, they had been in seperate bedrooms for 2 years she with the children.
He said, you can stay with me if you like, just let me see what I can get done. I was kinda scared then ... .Anyway, the weekend came, I took my daughter to my moms and drove 7 hours north to stay the weekend with him. I did not arrive there until close to 11pm, he came to a friend of ours home to meet me there. He was so happy smiling ear to ear, I went and took a shower there, because I was in scrubs. I am a nurse. He sat with our friends while I showered. then I followed him to his place. He had cleaned on his home for 6 weeks. We had a great time that weekend Sat morning was the ride. When we got back to his place, we sat on the sofa, I had to use the bathroom. So he told me to use his, I went to use it. HE was still talking, in the livingroom, and I was trying to pee, out of the corner of my eye I see him in the doorway. I was like ummmm he said Im sorry, then turned his back. I said turn the water on now. I finish we go back to the sofa, talking. Just heart to heart talks, and kinda cuddling. He says lets go eat dinner, we do . We come home, use the bathroom he does the same thing. I was like ok, water on. We go back to the livingroom, and I look at him say, WW you think I am going to steal something. He says no, he is very soft spoken, no I just know you are going to have to go home, and I want to spend all the time I can with you. That was sweet, I should have ran now.
My only insecurity he was not divorced. He did not want me to meet his children until the divorce was over, he did not want them to think it was because of me. 2 little spats, not fights. We did not live together, I had moved back to north Fl. WE long distanced for 6 months. WE had one spat, and I told him to leave me alone. So he did, he ignored me for 2-3 days, not answering my messages, no good mornings... He as has triggers I had found out by then. I still did not know just what it was or did to a person. He ignored me all week.WE had plane tickets to vegas, for my 50th, a rented harley, and he would not answer me. I finally sent a mesage asking if I needed to find someone to use his ticket he had backed out.Then I drove up there ,and talked some sense into him, and he told me about the abandoment issue, I didn't understand it, nor did I research it. He has every symptom, I see now. The depresson comes & goes.This man hates to look in the mirror, has bad dreams, 3-4 times a week. Has killed people, he is a Marine Seargent, Federal Inmate and this is where he was diagnosed when he was incarcerated as a federal inmate, and a 40 year biker. He is known and feared for violence. WE then started talking about his abusive childhood, his father worked 3 jobs, his mother, I see now is a narc. She would tell the father he did something wrong after her abuse, and the father would go beat the ___ out of him. his first memory is at 6mos old. There was not one family photo displayed at their home or sitting out anywhere. I was shocked, then when he was 8 his mother had another child, he was the golden child, and WW the scapegoat. The only love, and adoration were summers in Vegas at his mothers sisters, his Aunt. They loved him, and that is the only time he had love.
His father has Parkinson's and mother we were told Alzheimers. They had to be moved down finally. This is what tore us apart. Had I not gotten involved and helped move them down, setting up all their healthcare needs. Working myself to death.It was a "psychic vampire den". Then the hurricane hit and they had to come to my home, it was brand new, and the utilities underground, power in 18 hours. His was out for 10 days I had an eye dr appt and was diagnosed with an optic nerve tumor. His power was back on, and he took FMLA because I had to see a specialist also, I had not been home in 7weeks. Working 24/7 for 7 weeks. I was mentally & physically exhausted. I had to move all my daughters boxes back to the garage to go buy, a bed for his parents to stay in her room while here. That man depended on my for everything, I made ___ happen for him. He came to me and says, my mother doesn't want to go home. I said what, why? He says my place is beneath her, its a trailer. I marched in there, they were laid up in bed watching TV, I confronted her, she put this stupid look on her face and it said it all. I Told her she was the most unappreciative, ungrateful woman, and she should be ashamed. That her son was a good man, and he sacrificed alot to move them in with them. That woman barely speaks to him,and when I got on her butt, she said to me "But I love you" right in front of him,I have never heard her say that to him. I knew then was being cruel. I just didnt realize it untiI it was too late. I was the one that had to break it to him they could not live independently, and not into the home he picked out. That is where I worked my ass off, The hoarders house had not been finished... .I did it, and his father said I was the hardest working woman he had ever seen. That the home didn't look like the same home in just one week. It was just that, at least he had a clean home.
He took them home, and she was torturing him all week. I had began to figure out she was the problem with his father also, waking him up all night. Peeing herself on purpose at first when we moved them in. Pretending to not be able to walk, I see it all clearly now. Her second day in GA, they had new pt appts at theDR's. I told WW her son, she could walk. He said you really think so, I said I know so she is going to when I get her home. Sure enough I said come on, I know you can. Out she stepped, walked to the backdoor up the stairs into the home, and through it to her sofa, I called a perch. Laid up center of attention. I had her toilet trained in 1 week getting her up every 2 hours. WW caught on to her crap to. Ask if she had to go potty, no. I don't think so. wait till you get in the kitchen or sit down, and say I think I just went. He said it was catering to her his whole life. I made them schedules and routines in 2 weeks. He was amazed. I wonder if he knows that she is a narc? They left on a Sunday, and I could tell he was nervous. All week it had been about what they were doing driving him nuts, abusive texts like IF she does this one more time stuff. He told me he would grab his dad up under his armpits and make him run to the bathroom.I was to come back on Sat, I cancelled our date because my room was unpacked he had the kids, mine would have to stay home. I was give out, he understood so he says. Then I came sunday, to a home in my eyes was a damn mess. No AC running his parents hot as hell, it snowballed. I left to get a motel room. Never to be return, to even get my things I didn't grab. I told him I didn't have to stay there. I broke that man, I cooked dinner then left. That man has torured me since, used my niece against me to try and change the internet & cable out of my name. so I could not access the property, and come inside. FLAT out stonewalled me, and my daughter. ACTS Like we never existed. Causing her to cut herself. I am still in counseling, I had to make a police report about the internet, on my niece. He told everyone that I called the law on him. Because you get shunned for it in the biker community. So I got the proof. He has withheld my things, and will not pay me for working. I believe he has had a breakdown. I gave him the FLSA manual, and he went off the deep end saying you gonna sue me now. I had to ask him for money for my new glasses I needed, I was diagnosed with a optic nerve tumor while his parents were here. So then I was extorting him, his father died 12 weeks 4 days, after I left. He once told me he waited 20 years to get revenge on someone, he has patience and always gets his revenge. He is inflicting mental cruelty to his mother as well I seen it with my own eyes. He refuses all communication now. But he will read all the cards, letters, and things I sent him . He kept a Xmas card under his tree, it was his only one, and no presents. I have tried to reach him, went there he responds but then reality hits that he has to go up the street to clean his dad, because his help cant do her job. They have money to pay for better help. I think this is revenge for his mother keeping the money he inherited for his Aunts house that was sold. His father told him, after that's your mothers money now it was her sister. He is saving money for them. I brought his favorite quiche that night, and his Xmas gifts to him, he had already seen several. They were hand made, from shells from beaches we went to. That had the name of the place and what we did, and PR loves WW. So it they were special, he said no woman had ever done anything for him. I tried to show him, all the time how special he was, how handsome he is. our 1 year anniversary made a book for him. He didnt even own a watch. I started teaching myself to paint so I painted him a 2 pictures. I made a court case with what the cost of my services could have been, after he accused me of it. I let him think I was. I gave that to him also. I asked him why he moved his parents out, he grabs his head bends over and screams because they were driving me ___ing crazy." He then looks at me and says, I am divorced now. I said that's nice, you knew that was my insecurity. Now his dad, gone. I seen what he did to her. I pulled up she was in the front seat, smiling ear to ear, waving, and eyes big! He was at the trunk, putting the wheelchair in. He did not see her doing that I said to her you remember me? She mouthed my name and kept waving. At the DRs office, she did not even look up from the concrete when he was getting her out of the car, I spoke to her, and she tripped herself. She is taller than WW and he looked down, and she looked at me out of the corner of her eye, and then looked at him. Never once raising her eyes off the concrete. That told me the car ride was hell. They were already leary of him because of killing people. When he came out, I had made my mind up. I asked him what he wanted done with the his stuff in my car. I told him to keep my things, I did not want them. I said I don't want anything, he pulled off. Backed up let the window down, and says to sue him.
I sent him a sympathy card, from me & my daughter. She told him she still loved him, and it was going to be beach season soon. I put a small note in it, and told him a small package was coming. It had some cute memes and a note telling him this:
I did not need him for unemployment, I took care of it.I did not need his 1099 he was supposed to give me. I already filed my taxes, and was fine.
I then told him, he showed me his hand at the Drs office, that I knew what he was doing to them. I was not judging its none of my business. I wanted him to breath and be happy. That they hate happiness. To come fishing in Florida one day.
He came here 3 days later and filed a stalking petition that is all Perjured, I have a date with the states atty, who I went to school with. He had no evidence, I had stack. I have had to document, everything since leaving. IT was given just because it was not his court, and he did not want the responsibility on him. I am cool 6 mos freedom. I will prosecute him for my own 6months of hell ! Oct 28. I told the Judge thank you, he said you aren't going back are you? I said no I haven't lost anything there, and smiled and walked out!
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