bpd situationship?

[Depression = 72% of members]

recently i was cut off by a pwbpd who i cared for, and she told me that she wants to be friends in the future when we last spoke, but since then she’s blocked me on some social media and phone.

she said she cut me off because she was scared of a relationship, and i’m unsure what to do from here? i want to support and help her but i’m not sure after learning more about bpd if anything but NC would be useful

[kencarsonfan12]

recently i was cut off by a pwbpd who i cared for, and she told me that she wants to be friends in the future when we last spoke, but since then she’s blocked me on some social media and phone.

she said she cut me off because she was scared of a relationship, and i’m unsure what to do from here? i want to support and help her but i’m not sure after learning more about bpd if anything but NC would be useful

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[EyesUp]

@Ken...

Welcome.

It's natural to be concerned for someone else.  One thing you'll find here is that many of us who have or had relationships with pwBPDs is that we often prioritize them ahead of our own best interests - out of fear, obligation, guilt, enmeshment, dependencies, rescuer tendencies, etc., etc.

For almost all of us, a huge piece of moving forward - no matter what the outcome is - is learning to prioritize our own wellbeing.

What are you doing for yourself at this point?  Are you connected with friends and family?  Do you have a therapist?  Any activities or hobbies you've been neglecting lately? 

My advice is:  Take some time to put yourself first for a bit.   If your pwBPD truly needs something from you, she'll probably find a way to let you know. 

In the meantime, you might also consider that you should respect her boundaries - if she's gone incommunicado, consider respecting her wishes.