Residential Treatment: Journal of 12 Month Journey

[peaceplease]

lbjnltx,

I don't know what to say about the scan.  It sounds like it really wouldn't matter.  As if the treatment would be the same, but maybe more of answer if the patient was not benefiting from the care plan. 

Did the staff ask why she would ask, and take it from there?  She should have just replied in a very matter of fact, what the consequences would be for such actions.  As you stated there is more than just one staff member working with your dd.


peaceplease

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[whiletheseasonspass]

lbj,

I was thinking the same thing- that maybe it was a shock thing- power play- testing the waters.  After all you did send you D to this RTC  after careful searching because D exhibited behaviors at home that were about not only power and defiance but other things as well- some shock issues too.

What I was also thinking too agrees with what you said too "the therapist takes BPDd-13 to the barn and arena for individual therapist because BPDd-13 opens up more and projects onto the horses... .creating more open communication between them".) that your D does have a good relationship with the equine T and maybe it is about who your D feels more comfortable with.  It could be that the equine T is the one who ends up helping your D to want to be healthier.  And maybe your D relates to horses because pwBPD are so mistrusting of people but animals like dogs and horsed don't hurt you- they are gentle... .and do not have human qualities that can be misinterpreted.  Also it sounds like your D is very familiar with horses as I believe I have read that you have horses?   But back to that equine T - it seems like she shows your D her own (T) love of horses and between that and both personalities ( T/D) and horses- it could be why your D is better with the equine T. 

I love that T personally from what you have reported.  She sounds wonderful.   

I also think that when you use the words "baby steps"... .that is may be another way of saying "one day at a time" i.e. not looking at the global picture or trying to predict or dissect when you get a "message" from that center that makes you feel uneasy.

That is not to say- this is easy... .and this is not to say don't keep your eyes and ears open as a mother whose D is in this place.  And this is not to say don't listen to what your intuition tells you... .

I wish I could say more to bring you some comfort, Dear lbj... .but I do want to say that I think you are a very strong and smart mother... .and your D will benefit from your qualities - and from the way you are involved with D's placement in this facility.  This situation with your D is logistically and legally not entirely out of your hands like it is for those of us whose children are over age. 


    

wtsp




wtsp




 

[tammy]

As a new college graduate my nonBPD 25 year old daughter was offered a job at a residential treatment center. During her training she would call me disappointed that instead of really getting to "work with" these teens she was in more of a crowd control position. She understood the reasoning that in order to maintain some level of continuity that anything that happened had to be dealt with in a certain way so the other teens did not "feed" off of my daughter's reactions. Later the therapists would address "the issues". My daughter lasted 2 weeks. It was not her thing. But it is a system that works for that residential treatment center, the place has a very good reputation.

You were confident in your residential treatment center choice. You did your research . I understand your frustration. My BPD daughter's never been in a residential treatment center but has had therapists who just didn't seem to get her. She manipulated some and others just went for an easy diagnosis after throwing their hands up in surrender to BPD. As parents we know our kids, we have developed ways to deal with their behaviors. We also are more aware of the things we would immediately address.  But maybe this fresh approach will help your daughter. Maybe it is all part of a bigger picture that will eventually lead to your daughter being healthy. There are some positive changes in your daughter, right?

I honestly don't know what to say about the scan. If your insurance won't cover it and you are not convinced it is a helpful tool then it seems non negotiable! No means no wether you be a BPD, parent or therapist! I tried researching it but only found  information that was generated by the Dr who is offereing the service. They then had links to vitamin supplements. I've never believed a supplement would help my daughter so they lost me there!

[lbjnltx]

Thanks for the thoughtful replies dear friends!

peaceplease,

I don't know what to say about the scan.  It sounds like it really wouldn't matter.  As if the treatment would be the same, but maybe more of answer if the patient was not benefiting from the care plan.  

According to her individual therapist (the one recommending the scan who doesn't fully understand BPD traits) my BPDd-13 may have biofeedback therapy added to her treatment plan if the scan were to reveal abnormal brain activity in certain areas.  According to the Clements Clinic... .biofeedback is not any more affective than any other kind of therapy if the patient is resistant.  ;p

Did the staff ask why she would ask, and take it from there?

The information was put into a weekend report for the therapist to see.  I don't know if staff responses are included in this report.  I would guess that the well seasoned staff responded appropriately and watched BPDd-13 closely the rest of the time she had access to the chemical.

Dearest wtsp,

Thank you for the validating response.  Ironically enough, the equine therapist has not been mentioned by my BPDd-13 or BPDd-13s' individual therapist.  Perhaps because the equine therapist is less a therapist than BPDd-13's horse!  We hear a great deal about him... .a 3 year old palomino named "Little Doc".  

Dear tammy,

My BPD daughter's never been in a residential treatment center but has had therapists who just didn't seem to get her.

 I think the individual therapist understands how complex BPDd-13 is, just doesn't understand why or how her behaviors fit the BPD criteria.  

She manipulated some

 This is my main concern... .that the individual therapist will waste a great deal of time on issues that are not real... .just manipulation.  I think that if I have enough contact w/individual therapist that I can help keep it "real".

lbjnltx

[eac]

Thank you lbjltx! I appreciate your efforts to document your dd's RTC stay and to get it consolidated into one place once and for all! I will make great use of this valuable information and I am certain this will be a great help to many for years to come.

[qcarolr]

lbj -- what an awesome gift you give all of us parents managing to get your 10 posts for the rtc experience. I learned so much from you as this happened, and have tears reading it again as the case study. Joyfulness that your D is still making such progress in her life, using her skills, and having the supprot of you and her dad.


qcr

[lbjnltx]

I certainly did not expect it to be a "feature" and was even more shocked to see it as a "case study"... .I never thought of it like that... .more just a journal for my benefit as well as a possible benefit to others who might take the time to read it.

dd15 still doing very well.  she has her moments... .yet no rages, no threats, no self harm, just normal teenage stuff... .

AHH! NORMAL IS AWESOME...

Celebrate each moment ... .give as much weight to the "normal" and unremarkable days as the tough ones.



lbjnltx

[vivekananda]

How wonderful it is to read your good news lbjnltx! It is so good to hear a happy story 

[Gbirdmom]

Good luck to your family. Long-term is the way to go, to learn the skills, to use the skills, for your daughter to realize that they can help her endure and move beyond the disregulation. I'm interested in following your family's journey.

My daughter went to a great program for one month then did the step down and day program, maybe two months at most. I'm thankful for one month intensive but it should come with a truth in labeling statement... .girls like my daughter who was 17 at the time, need six months or more. Pay was out of pocket and one to two months was all we could afford. Now she'll be 20 in a few weeks... .and makes her own decisions about what she will and won't do.

Take advantage of her age and get in as much treatment as possible before she turns 18.

[lbjnltx]

Thank you GBirdMom for reading month 1 of our journey.  If you will notice at the bottom of the first page of this thread the other months listed (2-10) for how the journey continued.  I won't be spoiler... .in case you want to read the details for yourself (quite enlightening) ... .so I will just say for now that we continue to work with her outside of therapy for now.

lbjnltx

[Gbirdmom]

Oh, I just noticed the earlier dates... .thank you.

And thank you for sharing your family's journey.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[kellygirl601]

I am struggling to get my daughter into residential.  The problem is, my ins doesnt cover and we cant afford it.  She is now on SSI and qualifies for medicaid.  Do you know if any of these facilities accept medicaid?  That would be a God send for us.

Thank You.

[lbjnltx]

Yes, Kellygirl

Many of them do.  I believe that Red Rock Canyon... .a co ed facility in St. George Utah does.  Red Rock is a sister facility to Falcon Ridge.

The C.A.R.E. group that operates both of those facilities also just opened another facility in Utah... .not far from Falcon Ridge.  It focuses more on the arts than equine. 

Also, depending on the state you live in, even if insurance doesn't cover they are required to pay for "medically necessary" inpatient care... .this is what I hear from a friend who knows how to work the system.

Another option is the IEP.  If her pdoc and md agree that she needs inpatient care and can "order" it then her school district can be held financially responsible for paying for her placement. 

I will check w/Mariah at Red Rock today and ask her about the Medicare and the new facility.

I will get back to you on this ASAP.

Hang in there mom!

lbjnltx

[kellygirl601]

Thanks so much!  I feel like when I call around to get info, it just keeps going in circles... .she is 19 now, so nothing to do with the school district applies at this point.

Kelly

[kellygirl601]

And how do people find out how to "work" the system?  All I want is help for my daughter.  Everyone tells me she needs a case manager, but I dont know how to get one for her.  I feel like there is so much out there for her, but I dont know how to access it.

[lbjnltx]

I feel like when I call around to get info, it just keeps going in circles... .she is 19 now, so nothing to do with the school district applies at this point.

That makes a big difference.  The CARE facilities that I spoke of only accept minors...

Have you found any facilities that you believe would help her?

Getting a case manager would most likely need to be done with her cooperation and through the Mental Health System that she is a patient of... .I really don't know.  Is she currently in outpatient therapy?  Does she want to go to a residential facility?

lbjnltx

[kellygirl601]

Yes, she has always wanted to go to residential.  How does one get a case manager?  Right now she sees Therapist weekly and Psychiatrist monthly.

[lbjnltx]

Is her t and pdoc care through a county agency?

lbjnltx

[findhope]

Ibjnltx,

Your story has touched me in so many ways. First I had been told to look into Falcon Ridge. My DD does not have a BPD Dx, but her eval states things like personality traits that can "lead to a personality disorder" and describe her black and white thinking. When I showed it to another therapist, he said it was clear that the phychologist was coming as close to giving her a Dx without giving her a label (likely because she is a minor). I had to go to another state for her LD Dx because my state does not like to give kids labels. I thought the correct label of dyslexia rather than generic reading disorder would help her get the correct remediation, which it did. Now I wish I had the correct Dx for her mental health issues so I know we are doing the right things to help her.

Anyway, My daughter went to an RTC for 10 months when she was 14. I constantly felt like her therapist was ignoring the Psych eval. She had him wrapped around her finger. He treated her for clinical OCD, which she showed no signs of before she went, and no signs of once she came home. I kept saying OCD seems easy to fake. She became very interested in the drug use of the peers at the school. She told many lies about things she had done, concerts she had gone to... .He saw no signs of the ODD she had and said it must be just situational with her parents. I was always butting heads with her t. She graduated the program, came home started a new school. The counselor at her new school took one look at old report cards that always said nice things but had a "but... ." in them and said she saw ODD from her generally good grades. Within one month in this new private school, she told us she saw signs of a personality disorder. Wow 10 months of RTC, and her t. saw none. She did well for a while when she came home, and then set out on a plan to do all the things she had learned about at the RTC : Heroin, meth, prostitution, new ways to steal... .

She is currently in a wilderness treatment. I figured it would give us the time to figure out what to do next. At least I know she is safe for 6-12 weeks. So after one month you seemed on the fence with the RTC. And a little put out with the t. like I was at my daughters first RTC. how did your and your daughters experience end there? would you recommend it?

[lbjnltx]

Dear findhope,

Glad you are here.  As an advisor on this site I must first address the need for you to post an introduction on the New Members Board... .ok, formalities out of the way... .Thank you for reading the first month of the case study for my daughter's RTC experience.  If you look at the bottom of page 1 of this thread, you will find highlighted in blue months 2-10. 

It was quite an experience.  We all learned so so much.  My daughter enjoyed her first anniversary of her graduation March 19, 2012.

Would I recommend Falcon Ridge... .you bet!

lbjnltx

[Stressed2themax]

It is hard, my son has been in residential for 2 weeks, they are impressing me so far. I have said it is breathe of fresh air not having to worry about sleeping through the night, and worrying about what our next crisis is.  I wish you the best of luck!

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[barbara15]

Good morning Ibj

Hope and pray for your daughter and I am sure you are doing the best for her. What if she says no, can they keep her there forcibly?

[lbjnltx]

Good morning Ibj

Hope and pray for your daughter and I am sure you are doing the best for her. What if she says no, can they keep her there forcibly?

Yes, they could have Barbara as she was a minor at the time. When graduation time came she cried because she didn't want to leave this wonderful place and wonderful people... .her friends and mentors.  She's 18 now and doing very well.  Keep reading the story... .it's a happy ending. 

[Mseltz]

RTC is a fantasy for all but a very few.  If a family can come up with that kind of money, and then one family member balks, he should consider the rest of us who are still trying to payoff the last emergency room visit and would give our left arm for an RTC for our daughters.  Get off the fence and support this opportunity Dad!  My Goodness!

[lbjnltx]

Hi Mseltz,

My husband did get with the program and never regretted the financial commitment it took to help our daughter.  Sadly, he passed away about 2 years ago.

If you would like to continue reading about our RTC experience you can find the links below.



lbjnltx



BPD d13 in residential treatment center «

Month 1 Month 2  Month 3

Month 4 Month 5  Month 6

Month 7 Month 8  Month 9

Month 10

[Confusedalldaylo]

I am looking for a residential treatment center for my 13 yr old daughter. We are in Colorado. Please share success stories you have had. There are lots of bad reviews out there and I don't know where to turn.

[Moonshiney]

What a wonderful thread to read.  The people here seem so good-hearted and kind. I'm happy I found this site and hope to be able to contribute to it.   The biggest part of the original thread that got to me was this
 The 24/7 therapeutic environment will eventually wear her down and put her in the position of self reflection and recognizing personal responsibility.

I am with that in prayers and hope as my daughter has been in an RTF for over a year now and has regressed in her treatment.