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Author Topic: Falcon Ridge Ranch Month 10: BPD d13 in residential treatment center  (Read 12424 times)
lbjnltx
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« on: March 02, 2011, 01:14:08 PM »

 ok... .we are coming to the end of a miraculous part of our journey as a family... .BPDd-13 is due home on march 19th after more than 9 months at the residential treatment center... .i must have in place; school, neurofeedback therapy, math tutor, individual therapy, time on the calendar for weekly individual therapy w/her therapist at the residential treatment center, time on the calendar for Positive Peer Culture with the residential treatment center, scheduled appointment with her pdoc here at home, saddle back from the custom shop, weekly family meeting, and RELAXATION time. also, studying Positive Peer Culture to get a group started by the end of the summer. ;p

the good news:  i have almost all the paper work done to enroll BPDd-13 in online public school... .free!... .waiting on the ed. director at the residential treatment center to administer a diagnostic math test to see where my d is... .she must pass the test on april 2nd to be able to advance to 9th grade... .she is able to retest if necessary 2 times to pass it... .if she is too far away from passing I will need to scrap this plan and start over ;p ... .we will see.  i have gotten a commitment from a church member who teaches math to tutor BPDd-13 to help her work on areas of math she needs to pass the taks test.  the school is requesting a letter from the pdoc with diagnoses and how they affect her education, what special provisions she will need for school... .i requested the input of the individual t, ed. director for the writing of this letter... .i don't think the pdoc would know what to recommend for special provisions... .also, I don't know if he has dx BPDd-13 ad/hd... .

more good news:  had a conference w/a neurofeedback therapist yesterday... .awesome news!  he is well accomplished, published, a president of the neurofeedback association, low fees and may be willing to loan us equipment to conduct sessions online w/my d so that we won't have to travel as much... .still waiting for husband to give the "ok set up an appointment" speech... .

more good news... .well, maybe good... .spoke w/nale, the Positive Peer Culture leader at the residential treatment center... .told him my concerns about starting a Positive Peer Culture group... .:  no experience, afraid of damaging a young person, how will it work for my d if I am the group leader, how many times a week... .etc...

nale:  "you have to start somewhere", "now I know where BPDd-13 gets

         strong inner critic", "as long as your relationship is good with

         BPDd-13 it will benefit both of you", "all you can do is the best you

         can do".

BPDd-13's individual therapist will be back today at the residential treatment center... .don't know that she has talked to therapist here at home yet... .she was out for 2 weeks after surgery.  will wait to see what she says about "graduation"... .is it going to happen?  nale said today that BPDd-13 is doing well.  she has been beating herself up for making mistakes... .has an expectation of perfection... .;p

Positive Peer Culture cancelled yesterday... .BPDd-13 gone on a field trip.  Positive Peer Culture cancelled today... .BPDd-13 gone on a trail ride... .will try again on friday... .tomorrow we are scheduled for individual t... .i imagine we will be working on the home contract... .i sent an email to therapist yesterday about having to put our cat yoyo down... .she was 14... .same age as BPDd-13... .haven't told BPDd-13 yet... .waiting for therapist to be there for support... .don't know how this will affect BPDd-13... .she wasn't close to the cat but you just don't know. ;p

lbjnltx


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« Reply #1 on: March 02, 2011, 03:45:30 PM »

wow lbj things have come so far and seem so good for you and dd

wish you much success over the next weeks as you prepare for her graduation and return

very glad for you

melissa
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« Reply #2 on: March 02, 2011, 04:46:29 PM »

Thanks for posting - Now I know what I have to look forward to when my daughter gets out.  ;p

You are going to be one busy lady!  In spite of the crazy busy schedule, I'm sure that you'll be relieved once she comes home.  I'm happy for you.  Smiling (click to insert in post)
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« Reply #3 on: March 02, 2011, 05:13:30 PM »

Whew  Hope you can find a little time to breath - like right now. Stop reading this and give yourself 10 deep breaths!

You are truly amazing - a gift to your D14 and to all of us here. Seems we may have to let go a bit of our own as you will be so very busy after she gets home. You have set up to run an 'residential treatment center for one' there. This seems like a plan for success though. The follow up on a weekly basis will be so important as our D adjusts to a new and different life at home.

Keeping you all in my prayers.

qcr   Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)  
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« Reply #4 on: March 02, 2011, 07:49:43 PM »

dear lbjj,

I remember reading your first posts about the need to send your precious D to an residential treatment center.

I remember how it sadden you to take this step, but how resolute you were in making the decision and researching the options for the best possible outcome for your D

I can see that you are taking the same very important attitude to her home coming to ensure her success in the aftercare as you did those many months ago

You are strong and you always manage to do whatever it is you set your mind to doing and you do it with grace and diplomacy

I am confident that your D will be happy to be home and with all of the work that you have done too, will continue to heal and grow in healthy ways

There will most likely be times when you will be challenged, but then again, teenagers are supposed to be challening right?  You will rise to the occasion

As qcr mentioned, you will be busy, busy, busy... .remember to breathe but also remember to enjoy the ride.

All the best to you and your entire family 

pennifree     

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« Reply #5 on: March 02, 2011, 09:08:41 PM »

lbj,

Let me join the cheering section.  You have done an amazing job, and you are so inspiring.  Yes, you will be busy.  I am so happy for you, your husband and dd.   Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)  

Thank you for sharing with all of us.  You have given us a great gift.  Your support with your posts have touched many of us here.   

Thank you.  May God Bless you.


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« Reply #6 on: March 02, 2011, 11:48:32 PM »

dear friends,

thank you so much for your supportive words and well wishes.  I am doing the best I can and being patient waiting for leadership from above. Smiling (click to insert in post)

i got this email from my BPDd-13 a few minutes ago:

dear mom and dad,


i went on a trail ride but I didn't ride little doc cuz one of the equine people was riding him. so I rode Tuffy and he was acting up. i'm thinking about not graduating in march and just get a home visit with friends so i'll know what to do in those kind of situations. i'm sorry if this means we'll be apart for longer, but I need to do it for me. if we don't have enough money then i'll graduate. so please tell me.


i love you

wow.  seems like she is a bit afraid of coming home and having struggles... .mix that with not wanting to leave her friends and her support staff at falcon ridge... .who would have ever thought this defiant and obstinate girl would fall in love with the residential treatment center... .amazed. 

it is somewhat validating... .just more indication that I was lead well and listened closely to Him and followed through... .bitter sweet.


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« Reply #7 on: March 03, 2011, 12:52:51 AM »

lbj - the program there has worked just as intended for her, and the transistion to home must be scary for her. I will pray for everyone in her life to know how to help her use her new skills to cope with all the thoughts and feeling she must be experiencing. It is good her T will be back for her this week.

qcr    
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« Reply #8 on: March 03, 2011, 05:18:05 PM »

lbj,

Yes, it is bittersweet.  Your dd will miss her new friends and staff. Perhaps the anticipation of finding new friends is scary to her as well.  I can't recall if her friends were of bad influence or strayed away.  Either way, she will have adjustments to make.  It is hard being a teen with all of the peer pressure.  It is easier where she is in a controlled environment and has many restrictions in an institution.  However, she learned so much and has the tools to handle difficult situations. 

I feel confident that her T will help her with this fear.  The fact that she is scared is a good thing, I believe. 

I will pray for her adjustment and aftercare goes smoothly.  


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« Reply #9 on: March 03, 2011, 05:43:44 PM »

dear peaceplease and qcarol, melissa, tiredmommy and pennifree

Excerpt
I feel confident that her T will help her with this fear.  The fact that she is scared is a good thing, I believe. 

this is exactly what happened and it is a good thing that she cares and has fears of losing what she has learned/gained.

i will post todays' therapist session on a new thread for month 10... .hopefully this evening.

thanks guys... .

sure wish I could take all of us moms on a cruise to the bahamas... .we would be the bahama mamas  Smiling (click to insert in post)

lbjnltx
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« Reply #10 on: March 03, 2011, 07:05:57 PM »

Excerpt
sure wish I could take all of us moms on a cruise to the bahamas... .we would be the bahama mamas 

I second this motion!  We all deserve a cruise!

I'm relieved to hear that your d's therapist was able to help her process her fear.  The fact that she cares about things of this nature really shows how much progress she has made.   
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« Reply #11 on: March 03, 2011, 08:31:39 PM »

family t session  3-3-11

the session began with BPD14 asking about whether or not she could come home for a family visit and then return to the rtc to graduate at a later time.

t:  it sounds like you are scared and worried about going home.  the

    staff told me that you are very nervous about going home.

BPD14:  yes i am.

t:  you can graduate and go home and return here if you really need to.

     is the concern mostly about interacting with  your friends at home?

BPD14:  yeah.  i just don't know how i will react if i get in a situation

     that is not good for me.

me:  how do we know we can do the right thing in any situation?

BPD14:  practice?

me:  yes.  and you have had lots of challenges with peers there and

     have managed to use your skills.

t:  BPD14, you know that we do not graduate students unless they have

    earned it right?

BPD14:  yes. 

t:  why do some girls leave without graduating?

BPD14:  because the insurance ran out.

t:  right.  the treatment team believes you are ready to graduate.

BPD14:  (crying a little)

t:  does being ready to graduate mean you will go home and be

     perfect?

BPD14:  no.

t:  will the doors of falcon ridge close on you when you leave?

BPD14: no. i just am going to miss my girls so much.  i was the first

    one to help many of them when they got here.  i want to see them

    grow and get better. 

me:  when you leave falcon you will still be able to have ppc and t with

    lorneta.  you will be able to visit on facebook with other grads.

BPD14:  can i have group ppc over the phone?

t:  we can ask nali if it is ok to do that sometime.

BPD14:  i will be so worried about them.

t:  how many horses have you worked with here at the ranch?

BPD14:  3 or 4

t:  when you leave here do you trust the equine staff to take care of the

    horses and not let anything bad happen to them?

BPD14:  yeah.  i'm going to miss them too.

t:  can you trust the staff here to take good care of your friends and

    not let anything bad happen to them as well?

BPD14:  yes.i can. i can do that.

t:  you are panicking a lot.  do all the girls in trans panic a lot when it

   gets close to graduation time?

BPD14: yeah. this is normal isn't it?

t:  yes and not only is it normal it is good.  it means you care about

    doing well at home. because you care it means you will do well.

BPD14:  can i tell my group that i am graduating on the 18th?

t:  not yet.  that news may be difficult for some of them and we need

    to have support in place to help them through their feelings about

    your leaving.  we will have a good bye group meeting.

me:  BPD14, the best way that you can help your peers that you leave

    behind at falcon ridge is to come home and do well, be happy, and

    use what you have learned.  do you see how that would be helpful?

BPD14:  yes.

t:  mom is right.  doing well will be the best way to help your peers.

BPD14:  yeah.  it will give them hope that they can do it too.

t:  if you are feeling uneasy in a situation what do you need to do?

BPD14:  walk away.  then tell mom and dad so they can help me figure

    out how to handle that person or situation.  then i can go back to

    them and tell them how i feel and why i feel that way.

t:  right.  use your tools.  we would not  teach you tools here that

    won't work out there.

me: dad and i want you to know that we are working hard on getting

   some things in place for you here at home to help you succeed.  i

   have found a neurofeedback therapist in hit_ for you to see. he is

   really good at what he does and works with lots of kids  your age.

   we weren't able to do neurofeedback at falcon because we have run

   out of time.  do  you know what neurofeedback is?

BPD14:  yeah.  it's like brain waves and computer games that help you

   think better.  how often will i have to go and how long will it take to

   get there?

me:  we would initially have to go 2 times a week and it is a 2 hour

    drive.

BPD14:  oh... .i don't like to ride that much in the car.

me:  i know that so what we may try to do is stay the night w/sissy at

   her townhouse because she lives really close to the neuro t.

BPD14:  awesome.

me:  also the neuro t said that he may be willing to loan us the equip-

    ment to work some of the sessions online to cut down on travel.

BPD14:  great.  that sounds good.

me: you know you have to be enrolled in school when  you get home and the

   education director and lorneta both believe that home school is the

   best option for you until the end of this year.  joette is going to give

   you a diagnostic test in math to see where you are and what you may

   need extra help with.  i have a math tutor in place who is excited to

   get to meet you and help you until you pass the taks test in math.

BPD14: i really don't want to .

me:  i know.  i didn't like the idea much either at first.  after i though

   about it for a bit and did some research i think it is a wise choice for

   all of us.  i won't be your teacher.  it is an online public school with

   some virtual classroom time and chat rooms w/the other students on

   fridays.  that will give you a chance to use some of your skills and

   get some practice.  you will have a different  teacher for each of your

   subjects.

BPD14:  will i still get to have some time with  my real friends?

me:  yes you will.

BPD14:  i was not planning on this.

me:  i know. it is a surprise and it can be a good surprise.  if you think

   about going to individual t an hour each way once a week and going

   to neuro t 2 hours each way twice a week how can that work if you

   are in school?

BPD14:  oh.  it wouldn't work well.

me:  no, it would be too stressful.

t:  mom and dad have worked hard to get a good foundation laid for

   you to succeed at home.  why do you think they did that?

BPD14:  because they love me.

t:  why do you think people have kids?

BPD14: uh... .i can't believe i don't know this... Laugh out loud (click to insert in post) too have someone to

    love.

t:  mom, why did you have BPD14?

me: because God wanted me to have her.  she has taught me to love

   on a level i would never have achieved without her.  even the tough

   times have challenged me to grow and be a better person and love

   in a selfless way.  unconditional love is what it is all about.

dh: we were ready for you.  we made plans for you.  mom decorated

    your room in the little 2 bedroom house we lived in.  you are a big

    part of the family.  school, friends, church, therapy, these  are like

    links in a chain.  if one becomes weak what will happen?

BPD14:  it will break the chain.

dh:  if a link in  your chain starts to become weak we will help you to

    remember to use your tools and strengthen it back up.

t: if you are doing what you are supposed to be doing how strong will

    the chain be?

BPD14:  strong!

t:  is there a chance you will fail?

BPD14:  well yes. i guess there is a small chance.

t:  if you are doing what you are supposed to be doing will you fail?

BPD14:  no.

t:  open and honest communication will keep the chain strong.  if you

  rebel it will fall apart.  the after care program that mom and dad and

  falcon ridge has set up for you is in place.  you have worked harder

  than anyone in your group.  you are my first girl to graduate the

  program. we kind of started here at falcon at the same time. 

BPD14:  i promise i will not NOT follow the plan.

t:  you sound much happier and confident in graduating now than you

   did at the beginning of this call.  what mind were you in when we

   began therapy today?

BPD14:  emotional mind.

t:  do you feel better now?

BPD14:  yes. lots!

t:  are the emotions still there?

BPD14:  yes.

t:  yes they are.  they are just under control.  mom and dad and BPD14

  if you ever need unscheduled family t over the phone just call and we

  will find a way to make it happen asap.  BPD14, you must find a way

  to transfer your skills home. do you use boundaries w/peers here?

BPD14:  yes.

t:  you will need to do the same thing at home.  be careful how you

  use them and how you check your peers at home.  be in control of

  your emotions, don't let those emotions control you. 

BPD14:  ok.

t:  anything else mom or dad?

me:  well, i have some sad news to share with BPD14.  we had to put

  down our kitty yoyo.  she and BPD14 are the same age.  i took her to

   the vet and he said she is just worn out and there is little else we

   could do for her.  i'm sorry BPD14 to have to tell you that.  are you

   ok?

BPD14:  yes i am ok.

t: it is sad when we have to lose a family pet.

me:  ok. well i love you BPD14.  i am so proud of how well you are

   doing and how hard you are working.

BPD14:  oh, mom, i need some money to go buy stuff to make my quilt

   and i am broke up here.

me:  ok. 

t:  call karen and work that out with her.

me:  ok. i will

BPD14:  don't forget mom, i really need to get started on my quilt

   soon.  write it down.

me:  i am writing it down.

t:   Laugh out loud (click to insert in post) you know mom, she writes everything down.  Laugh out loud (click to insert in post)

BPD14:  bye mom, bye dad. love you.

t:  good job today BPD14,  you are much more calm and have a better

   understanding of your after care plan and the support it will provide

   for your continued success.

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« Reply #12 on: March 03, 2011, 10:10:24 PM »

LOL... .Where can I sign up for the cruise?  I'll gladlly be a Bahamas Mamma with all of you!

I agree that is good D is scared as it's a sign that she doesn't want to lose what she's got and she knows that she has a good situation in a loving family who have made great sacrifices so  that she will be able to live a good life.  That knowledge is priceless in MHO.

Best we can all do is take it one day at a time.  Smiling (click to insert in post)

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« Reply #13 on: March 03, 2011, 11:14:25 PM »

lbj - WHEW. Can you let out that breath - I was holding mine for you Smiling (click to insert in post) Such a good session and chance for each of you to talk about the after care plan in such a positive way. If this will work for anyone - well I believe there is the greatest hope for a succesful transistion for your D14. 

You give us all such hope that doing the work can give back benefits. Thanks.

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« Reply #14 on: March 04, 2011, 01:29:15 AM »

it's 1:27 am and i am still awake... .so excited that BPD14 has earned her graduation... .so excited about how well she was able to communicate her emotions, thoughts, work through the big changes, so excited she is coming home!

Smiling (click to insert in post)

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« Reply #15 on: March 04, 2011, 03:16:34 PM »

PPC Chapters 7,8         3-4-11


we had a fairly brief session today.  dh not able to be on the phone with us.

we talked about the ppc process and BPD14 helped me better understand each of the parts of a ppc session.

we discussed the responsibility that comes with leading a ppc group, how that responsibility will be a shared one between she and i.  i asked her to think about when we could devote the time and energy to starting a group. 

nale, the ppc leader pointed out to me as we did an exercise on the different roles of a ppc how these roles are the equivalent to what we studied in the book "i don't have to make everything all better"... .listening with the right motivation, validating, asking validating questions, and having boundaries.

soo... .i was thinking about this site and how we follow the ppc process without even knowing it.

part 1. reporting problems... .we post about the events in our lives and

          the problems these events cause for us and our kids. as a reader, we 

          might read several posts without responding.

part 2. award the meeting... .we choose which posts we will respond to.

part 3. problem solving... .we validate, ask validating questions (that

           can lead the author of the post to seek answers), we tell what

           has worked for us when we had the same problem.

part 4. the summary... .we usually close our post with positive words

           to encourage problem solving techniques, looking within for

           answers, and words of comfort and support.

within each of these parts we play roles of a. the demander... a firm,

         strong, not easily manipulated person who will bring to light

         what can be done about a situation.  b. the soother... .a validator.

         c. the stimulator... .the motivator, encourager.

there are many techniques like reversal, positive spin, etc... .that i need to learn/practice.  i am hoping the BPD14 will realize that we need to wait until school is over and taks tests are all passed before we start up the group.

thanks for reading.

lbjnltx
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« Reply #16 on: March 04, 2011, 06:28:51 PM »

lbj - so excited for you and your family.

What really jumps out to me from your last post is the common threads the seem to permeate so much of my life these days - no matter the language/philosphy/style. It so reaffirms for me an experience I had in deep mediation many years ago that all life comes from the same source - is on a similar path to finding purpose in our short lifetime - and return to the same source. It is so very sad to me that we humans allow the miscommunications deflect us so - yet this is a part of the journey as well.

Feeling/thinking in a very philosophical way the past few days. Need to ponder where that is coming from.

Thanks from sharing. did't mean to hijack your post. get me to the right place here again.

qcr
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« Reply #17 on: March 04, 2011, 09:48:54 PM »

dear qcarol,

Excerpt
Feeling/thinking in a very philosophical way the past few days.

let it flow... .explore it... .embrace it... .claim it... .live it... .

this is how i broke out of the box of limitation on how to "be"... .

where the real growth happened within

the entire world changes when you see it from a new set of eyes



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« Reply #18 on: March 08, 2011, 02:29:08 PM »

Fantastic milestone!  I hope your daughter does great at home.
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« Reply #19 on: March 08, 2011, 03:30:37 PM »

GREAT interaction you report! I feel very positive for you all

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« Reply #20 on: March 08, 2011, 09:01:29 PM »

thanks dear friends for reading about our families experience with our daughter in residential treatment.

the biggest dilemma BPD14 has right now is what to wear for graduation... .the theme is "rock around the clock" poodle skirts for all the girls... .BPD14 would like to wear jeans to graduate... .that is against the rules... .case manager tells her she has to wear the poodle skirt... .i suggested she talk to her individual t and use her negotiating skills to reach a compromise... .i also have reminded her twice that the most important part is the "graduating" part... .i also validated her strong belief that it is HER graduation that SHE has worked hard for and she should get to wear what she chooses as long as it meets the standards of falcon ridge... .we will see what happens... .i'm rooting for her to win this one and wear her red/black plaid pleated skirt, black tights, black long sleeve shirt and red/black flats  Smiling (click to insert in post)... .i hope this is the biggest problem we have for awhile

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« Reply #21 on: March 08, 2011, 09:08:28 PM »

Smiling (click to insert in post)... .i hope this is the biggest problem we have for awhile

me too.  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)

qcr
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« Reply #22 on: March 10, 2011, 12:17:55 PM »

Family T session 3-10-11

sorry to say dear friends that today's session did not go well.

BPD14 is back on probation again.  she is really struggling with her intense emotions about leaving and about coming home.

leaving - abandonment fears, lack of object constancy

coming home-intense fear of messing up which = complete failure in

             her mind

she is trying to put in place some of her old coping skills... .the music she used to  listen to, the video games she used to play.

she started the therapy by asking if she could listen to the  music (you know the kind... .satan screaming at you through the car radio, drugs, sex, self hatred, hate the world) and play the video games (rated M for mature... .blood, violence)

a circular argument began... .the t asked her to get into Wise Mind several times... .she would say she was but within seconds it was obvious she was not... .BPD14 was trying to control the conversation and keep the argument going... .t suggested we stop the call for a few minutes... .took it off speaker, put  it back on speaker... .round and round we went.  after trying to get BPD14 to come around and accept that these things were not good for her... ."poison to her mind and spirit" she asked me if she bought them with her own money could she have them... .i replied "NO".  she started up again... .saying we were being "over protective"... .i told her "i'm done with this circular argument and i'm going to hang up now.  i think we all need some self time".

t called me back after taking BPD14 to her class... .we discussed the stress BPD14 is under right now... .we discussed the unnecessary pressure being put on her by all the tests... .4 being administered when it was only supposed to be 1... .t believes once she gets home she will be ok... .will talk to the clinical director for her input on monday... .asked me what i want to do... .? told her the bottom line is that dad won't go for longer stay... .$... .gone... .t did say she still believes BPD14's brain is miswired and hopes neurofeedback t will pick up on that and how to work to correct it... .that they have done all they can through cbt to help her... .

the bottom line... .she is scared and sad... .for a BPD that means she is

TERRIFIED AND DEVASTATED... .for this state... .she really isn't doing too bad.  ;p

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« Reply #23 on: March 10, 2011, 06:14:08 PM »

lbj - so very sorry D14 is struggling so, and the difficulty this is for you and dh. BPD and the "miswiring" make the intensity for D14 so much more than we can really know. Surely do pray for her to find the guidance within to access the tools she does have there. You also have these tools within you , and your dh also, as well as a fountain of faith to draw on. So have your self-care plan in place as this transition comes about - you may need all the strength you can draw on. What is D14's safety plan for home if she just cannot access her Wise Mind and circles down into her old coping patterns? Would her working with this help ease some of the fears she has about coming home?

As always - you are in my thoughts and prayers - all 3 of you.

qcr            
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« Reply #24 on: March 10, 2011, 06:40:17 PM »

Excerpt
What is D14's safety plan for home if she just cannot access her Wise Mind and circles down into her old coping patterns?

we have all of our coping skills listed and posted... .each of us with a copy... .one on the fridge... .if none of them work she is to go to "self"... .which means take a  time out, either in her room or outside with the horses... .

i talked to her t a few minutes ago... .she has checked on her 3 times today as said BPD14 is smiling, waving... .just like nothing happened... .a very familiar pattern to me... .

i am fine, i believe BPD14 will pull it together so that she can graduate.  time is the enemy here... .she has earned graduation... .she just is not using her skills right now... .she needs to pull herself together pretty quick though.

the education director sent me the results of her reading taks test.  score 89.8%... .  .2% from a commended status score... .passed it and then some... .still waiting on the math score... .waiting and waiting and waiting... .

t said she had conference w/pdoc about writing the letter for the 504 plan ... .t told him everything that needed to be in the letter ie: special accommodations to help her succeed.  t told me pdoc is writing a recommendation for add/adhd evaluation and possible meds.  really don't want any new meds... .hoping neurofeedback is going to help her enough that we don't have to put her on meds... .t said she does not think she would meet the criteria for adhd... .fidgety but not quite hyperactive... .borderline hyperactive... .there's that word again. ;p   the writing of the letter is in the hands of the pdoc... .great

i just hope she passes the math test with some room to spare... .t also told me that BPD14 hasn't been given the taks for social studies and science... .only study guides for future reference... .perhaps BPD14 thinks she is going to have to take these tests too at falcon... .i asked the t to make sure BPD14 knows she won't be taking those tests at falcon...

t said she may have BPD14 call me tomorrow during her lunch hour for quick chat if BPD14 is in her Wise Mind... .we will see.

thanks

lbjnltx
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« Reply #25 on: March 10, 2011, 07:11:25 PM »

lbj,

I can imagine how terrified your dd must be.  Again, I believe that this is a normal reaction.  And, as you stated that to a non, it would be sacred and sad, but to those with BPD the emotions are highly intensified.  And, the stress of the tests could have put her in dysregulated emotions mode. 

I hope and pray that she is in her Wise Mind, tomorrow, so you can chat. 


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« Reply #26 on: March 11, 2011, 01:56:11 PM »

just talked to t and BPD14,

all is well.  BPD14 went to her peer group for help and support... .once more she is in her Wise Mind.  came to the conclusion that "if it isn't good for me i don't want to do it"

my reply:  awesome. wise choice. we can replace those things that aren't good with other things that are.

BPD14:  yeah.  and i can earn access to more mature themed games with my maturity.

t:  with maturity comes responsibility and wisdom and the desire to make choices that are good for you.

me:  so happy you are doing better today.

t:  still think she will be able to graduate

me:  great.   i believe in her ability to bounce back and regroup. i am sitting here waiting for the math test results and course selection for school.

BPD14:  well someone deleted about 1/2 of the test i did so now i have to go back and redo some of it.

me:  oh no.  well, have you made any course selections?

BPD14:  i just heard about that a few minutes ago.

me:  do you think that you can get that done when we hang up?  we are on a deadline and time is running out.

BPD14:  yeah

t:  i will tell them you are working a deadline and see if she can finish that up. i talked to her t at home today and he is so excited to be able to see BPD14 again.  he needs to know the name of the dbt skills workbook you have so that he can look at it.

me:  i have 2 copies.  BPD14, i also have a workbook for me so that we can all do this together.

BPD14:  sounds cool.

t:  ok, i have another appointment so we have to go now.

BPD14:  bye mom, love you

me:  love you to sweetypop.

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« Reply #27 on: March 11, 2011, 02:26:08 PM »

YIPPEE!  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)  This is so awesome. Thanks for keeping us all updated as the momentous day arrives for graduation.

qcr
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« Reply #28 on: March 11, 2011, 04:07:23 PM »

lbj,

Yay!  Let's do the happy dance! Smiling (click to insert in post)  She will be ready to graduate on the 18th, right?

I am so glad that you were able to talk to her.  Life is good!


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« Reply #29 on: March 11, 2011, 06:03:38 PM »

right... .if the center holds Smiling (click to insert in post)!
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