Update

[Foreverhopefull]

 

Every year it's a struggle to get my husband to participate fully to the holidays festivities. This year was something else all together. All I could say was WOW.

He showed up for the festivities on the 24 and 25 of December and the 1st of January. Not only did he showed up, but he fully interacted with everyone. He even came and enjoyed with us the bonfire we did on Christmas day... .  that was one of the things he feared the most, but ended up enjoying the most. He also never comes to New Year's brunch, but he did this year. He even agreed to go eat diner at my parents that evening too. He even went to do the grocery shopping for me yesterday (something he has done maybe every 2nd month or so... .  if I'm lucky)

This year, thanks to him, my mother finally went to the true meaning of Christmas... .  family. He had asked my mother not to get him gifts, that all he wanted was to enjoy good food with people he wanted around him. So everything was planned according to being together as a family and good, simple food. He even said thank you to my mom for the great time.

I do fear that New Year's might bring so step back. My grand-pa is very sick and couldn't make it to brunch (even if we moved it t his retirement home to accommodate him better). At one point, he passed out while I was helping him to get into his bed, which freaked me out and it freaked out my husband too (I'm extremely close to my grand-pa and my husband loves that man as his own grand-father he never had). Since then, he's been extremely anxious and not feeling good.

So I'm hoping that he will keep up being open about how he feels and doesn't shut himself up.

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[united for now]

Thanks for sharing your success 

What do you think helped your H do better this year than last?

[Seahorse1]

Always nice to hear positive posts. I'm glad you had a nice Christmas

[Scarlet Phoenix]

Wow, thanks for posting an inspirational story  I hope things continue to go well for you.

[Foreverhopefull]

United,

I think that him knowing from the start that mom had respected his "no gifts" request helped allot, add to that that no one was trying to pretend that it's been a great year and everything is always peachy.

The holidays felt more like us getting together for a casual diner than the stress of the holidays.

[united for now]

So less stress and lower expectations... .   

[Foreverhopefull]

Absolutely. No expectations, no stress was the key word this year.

There wasn't tons of people around either so that helped allot too.

The funny part is that things he was worries about he still tried and loved them (i.e. we did a bonfire for Christmas and he was worried about our dog getting too close to the fire and him roaming around or going after a deer and getting hurt, well, he still came out to the fire and actually had a great time, he was one of the last ones in the house.)

He definitely got a A+ for the Holidays.