Hello

[cslaurie]

Hello,

I just wanted to make an introduction post-i'm glad to have found this Forum.

I'm 45 years old, married since '88 to my hubby. No human kids, but 5 furry ones (cats) : )

My Mom is the one that was/is BPD-altho she was never officially diagnosed, in the therapy i received for myself, they definitely believe this would be the case, & she probably would have been diagnosed with a few other things too. In my adult life, i started to emulate her behavior that i grew up around. I didn't notice it immediately, but eventually came to this conclusion & got myself some help-my hubby is also very supportive. I don't want to act as miserable as she was/is-life is too precious & beautiful. She is now in her mid 80's, & Dementia has set in-& she is still pretty miserable. She is living in an assisted care facility as of a year ago.

I also have 2 brothers, aged 62 & 63-i was the late baby for my Mom. One of my brothers' also has mental issues (undiagnosed as well) but my other brother somehow managed to escape having them. I don't have any contact with either of them as well, & they don't have any contact with each other-they HATE each other-the one with mental issues has threatened to kill the other on several occasions. I DO have some contact with my niece & nephew who are the kids of my "normal" brother-i wouldn't be against contact with my "normal" brother, it's just that i think so many years of my Mom tired us both out, not to mention that he left home around 16 (when i was born) so i was really an "only child". My other brother also moved out at 15-i never really got to know either of them much. But the brother with mental issues moved in & out of my Mother's house many times while i still lived there, ifrom my preteen years till when i moved out to get married. So i got to see a lot of what he was like then.

My Dad left when i was 5 & moved to Florida, remarried... .  i hadn't spoken to him in 27 years when one day he wrote to me wanting to make amends. I was in my 30's at that point-we wrote each other for several years & he visited me once. Sadly, he passed away from cancer a few years ago. I am always glad for the time i did have, to get to know him somewhat.

I hope this wasn't too long of an Intro post-i look forward to reading, posting & learning here : )

Laurie

[Suzn]

Hello cslaurie   

It sounds as though you've done some work already learning about BPD. I'm glad you've found us though sorry you've had to. What a shame you haven't had an opportunity to get to know your brothers better and I'm very sorry for the loss of your father. 

There are many members here with a parent with BPD who all understand your struggle. I'm glad to hear you have a husband who is so supportive. What does your relationship with your mother look like today?