It's her party and she'll cry if she wants to

[twojaybirds]

I so saw it coming.  My dd has been in the euphoric/manic "how great is everything phase for the past two or three weeks it seems.  She started slipping last week - being more negative. Saturday she turns 19.

FB posts have been about the great party - the hooka bar - the dinner; atleast up till today when that changed to " I am doing nothing on my birthday and no one cares."

I have stayed clear of it all.  I only offered to take her out to dinner or lunch with any friend of hers and a friend of mine  (shield)  I want to keep it short and sweet  - buy a nice dinner and hand her gifts.  SHe agreed and picked a friend last night then changed that friend later then texted me today about the NOTHING she is doing.   I took control of me.  I will come down on Saturday, take you out to lunch and give your presents.   You can have a friend with you if you want.  See you Sat. at 1:00.

I cannot imagine what may transpire between now and then.   

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[StrugglingMom76]

That is the hardest part of all of this never knowing what to expect minute to minute. I am right with you on the feeling. I hope all goes well.

[twojaybirds]

Another fb post that "my birthday is going to suck"

until an hour ago when she called to tell me how busy she is ... .  all her friends are taking her out tonight and Saturday too.

I validated the excitement in her voice and told her I didn't want to interfere with friends so just to call me about us getting together.

I am inhaling deeply preparing for the emotional letdown which seems to always come especially around holidays.

[vivekananda]

fingers crossed for you 2Jbirds, hope it all goes well enough and the let down is minimal.

Vivek   

[jellibeans]

Yes I don't look forward to birthday at all... .  my dd is always disappointed too... .  I think it is her anxiety and the anticipation of the up coming day... .  I just hold my breath and hop all goes well... .  I think you handled it the right way... .  I am hoping she has a good day!