I have been trying to change jobs for a while. I used to have a 'career' but the rollercoaster ride put paid to that. I could cope with the loss of status and money but the place I now work is just as dysfunctional as my relationship and so there has been no 'escape'. I've applied for several jobs in last few years but every time I've had an interview, something has come up in the days before and I've been in a mess by the time I had the interview. I've had ex file for divorce; ex come back; ex just left - you know the drill. Don't think he did this deliberately but just to make sure that there wasn't even some unconscious sabotage going on I didn't tell him about the latest interview.
Didn't work. Just days before, I found out that exH is to marry in a few weeks (they started dated in December). This messed me up again - more because of my kids than me this time. i just couldn't concentrate.
I woke on the morning of the interview with a very clear voice in my head saying "you will fail". I nearly phoned and cancelled. But I really needed a change so I went and I couldn't believe it when I got offered the job. Not only that, they offered a little more money because they really wanted me.
I was so excited and also a bit sad because I realised how desperate I have become for some kind of affirmation of worth! It's not my dream job or anything but it does feel like a step forward and I really need that just now.
Hope you all have a better week ahead of you.
