Ran into the ex. Eeek.

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Well there he was in all his glory sitting at the bar drinking. So much for his newfound sobriety. Two months ago when he swore he would send me the money he owed me, he claimed he just needed to stay away from drugs and the bar. He was never one to want to go out to the bar much so it's interesting he's now been spotted at the bars the last few weeks. His drugs of choice were in pill form.

I am proud of myself actually. I walked in with 3 friends. The funny part is that we all sat down at a table right next to him and were there for a little while before I even realized he was sitting next to us! My friend said my eyes just got super wide and I said OM-f'n-G. She said we are leaving. I said absolutely not. I knew he would leave if we didn't and I didn't feel the need to ruin my plans for him ever again. I didn't look at him again. Not once. I never spoke a word to him. Five minutes later he went to the bathroom and left with the guy he was with.

I wanted so bad to tell him off, tell him how disgusting he is, tell him he needs to pay me back all the money he owed me, tell him I can't stand him. But... . what's the point? That would have been the old me that cared. He looked bad. I know he's not sober. I'm sure he had popped a few pills before he went out and if he hadn't he will be soon.

Best part... . I am not feeling as bad as I thought I would be feeling. Unfortunately its caused me to think about his more than I want to today but at least I know his claim of sobriety is total BS just like everything else that's ever come out of his mouth.

I am proud of myself. I didn't acknowledge him, pay any attention to him and didn't let him ruin my night.

[feelingcrazy7832]

Well there he was in all his glory sitting at the bar drinking. So much for his newfound sobriety. Two months ago when he swore he would send me the money he owed me, he claimed he just needed to stay away from drugs and the bar. He was never one to want to go out to the bar much so it's interesting he's now been spotted at the bars the last few weeks. His drugs of choice were in pill form.

I am proud of myself actually. I walked in with 3 friends. The funny part is that we all sat down at a table right next to him and were there for a little while before I even realized he was sitting next to us! My friend said my eyes just got super wide and I said OM-f'n-G. She said we are leaving. I said absolutely not. I knew he would leave if we didn't and I didn't feel the need to ruin my plans for him ever again. I didn't look at him again. Not once. I never spoke a word to him. Five minutes later he went to the bathroom and left with the guy he was with.

I wanted so bad to tell him off, tell him how disgusting he is, tell him he needs to pay me back all the money he owed me, tell him I can't stand him. But... . what's the point? That would have been the old me that cared. He looked bad. I know he's not sober. I'm sure he had popped a few pills before he went out and if he hadn't he will be soon.

Best part... . I am not feeling as bad as I thought I would be feeling. Unfortunately its caused me to think about his more than I want to today but at least I know his claim of sobriety is total BS just like everything else that's ever come out of his mouth.

I am proud of myself. I didn't acknowledge him, pay any attention to him and didn't let him ruin my night.

[feelingcrazy7832]

Oh and best part is one of the friends I was with is the sister to my gay friend who my ex made up a story about that is hideous. My eBPD disgusting boyfriend at the end would claim my friend raped him in his sleep. Give me a break! He was on god knows how many drugs that night but never would admit he lied about it. I just giggled today thinking he had to feel horrid about himself seeing my friend's sister with me but then again, he is BPD and it probably didn't even phase him. I'm so happy he left and I hope I don't have any further run ins.

[Sleuth]

Wow. Excellent job. I truly hope when that day comes for me I handle it with as much nonchalance, I somehow doubt it! Well done.

[feelingcrazy7832]

Thanks Sleuth. I'm kind of still completely shocked I handled it as well as I did. It helped that he didn't look very healthy and he was hanging out with one of his loser friends that I've never liked. If he looked really good and was with some woman, I doubt I would be feeling as ok as I am right now. 

[Sleuth]

Still a big victory though. I'm definitely imagining the worst case scenario when I run into mine. Benefits of pessimism = things only ever working out better than you imagine. Or so I tell myself.