They walk amongst us...

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

Well hello there   I'm back.  But... . with much more knowledge and power to take action.  Not going to bore you with my past on here but I survived a breakup with my BPD gf. 

Well 3 months ago a woman that works for the same organization as me saw me at the bar and started to talk to me.  I didn't even realize that she worked where I did.  The red flags I saw in her were definitely BPD like and I was on high alert... . here are some of them:  has a boyfriend, wants sex with me but no relationship, lies constantly, sexually abused as a child by her uncle, has a dysfunctional relationship with her roommate that she had a relationship with before (the roommate lost custody of her kids and smokes marijuana daily), heavy drinker, had 2 DUIs was on house arrest and currently has a breathlyzer on her car, told me that all girls that get involved with her eventually want to punch her, when I didn't answer her immediately she would get mad but she can ignore me, likes me... . then hates me, uses people (including me).

Well the last 2 weeks have escalated and this friends with benefits arrangement definitely doesn't have any benefits.  I don't like how I am when I am with her.  I had a weird weird weird exchange with her and her roommate.  Her roommate hates me and is jealous of me.  I wish I could say none of this happened because it seems so bizarre that I was even involved with this.  I guess what I do know is that I deserve better than this crap.  The stories I could tell you about these past 3 months sound just like the ones on here.  This BPD was different than my ex BPD gf but a BPD is a BPD is a BPD.  And... . even if she never gets the label as BPD  i know this... . why would I want to be with someone like this?

Sorry for the rambling but can't believe I was involved with her.  It's over I can't do this anymore.  She definitely needs help but I am not here to save her... . It's time that I save myself. 

So I came back to here because this site has helped me so much in getting over my ex BPD.  We live and learn.  And... . I am learning. 

[OTB]

Well hello there   I'm back.  But... . with much more knowledge and power to take action.  Not going to bore you with my past on here but I survived a breakup with my BPD gf. 

Well 3 months ago a woman that works for the same organization as me saw me at the bar and started to talk to me.  I didn't even realize that she worked where I did.  The red flags I saw in her were definitely BPD like and I was on high alert... . here are some of them:  has a boyfriend, wants sex with me but no relationship, lies constantly, sexually abused as a child by her uncle, has a dysfunctional relationship with her roommate that she had a relationship with before (the roommate lost custody of her kids and smokes marijuana daily), heavy drinker, had 2 DUIs was on house arrest and currently has a breathlyzer on her car, told me that all girls that get involved with her eventually want to punch her, when I didn't answer her immediately she would get mad but she can ignore me, likes me... . then hates me, uses people (including me).

Well the last 2 weeks have escalated and this friends with benefits arrangement definitely doesn't have any benefits.  I don't like how I am when I am with her.  I had a weird weird weird exchange with her and her roommate.  Her roommate hates me and is jealous of me.  I wish I could say none of this happened because it seems so bizarre that I was even involved with this.  I guess what I do know is that I deserve better than this crap.  The stories I could tell you about these past 3 months sound just like the ones on here.  This BPD was different than my ex BPD gf but a BPD is a BPD is a BPD.  And... . even if she never gets the label as BPD  i know this... . why would I want to be with someone like this?

Sorry for the rambling but can't believe I was involved with her.  It's over I can't do this anymore.  She definitely needs help but I am not here to save her... . It's time that I save myself. 

So I came back to here because this site has helped me so much in getting over my ex BPD.  We live and learn.  And... . I am learning. 

[Lucky Jim]

Hey OTB, Sounds like you went from the frying pan into the fire!  Yet you saw the red flags that you enumerate and still forged ahead anyway, which suggests to me like you needed to go down this path again.  I guess my question is: how many times do you have to go down this path before you decide to avoid it?  Only you know what is right for you.  Hang in there, LuckyJim

[OTB]

Yes I did take the walk down the path again... . but this time I got out in 3 months not 3 years!  So to me I am learning and growing.  And sometimes it takes a while for the BPD to come out in new interactions... .

[AllyCat7]

Yes I did take the walk down the path again... . but this time I got out in 3 months not 3 years!  So to me I am learning and growing.  And sometimes it takes a while for the BPD to come out in new interactions... .

3 months is WAY better than 3 years. Bravo to you