Introduction

[parkfriend]

Hello.  My daughter, aged 19, has been diagnosed with BPD, and on the one hand it is a relief, and the information we've each discovered has been enlightening and hopeful.  On the other hand, it seems we each have to face suffering and the unknown.  The reaction by others--health professionals especially--to the BPD diagnosis is generally one of turning away, or an irritation at 'not being serious about getting better'.  I'm hoping to find people here with similar experiences and knowledge about 'getting better' in a way that works.  This territory seems to be so much in the shadows!

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Hazelrah]

Hello Parkfriend, and 

Having a loved one diagnosed with a serious mental illness can be scary at first; on the other hand, having that diagnosis can also be the first step towards healing.  Please know that, first off, you've joined a wonderful community of caring people who understand what you are experiencing.  You are not alone.

It's true that some therapists are not well-equipped to deal with BPD.  On the other hand, there are success stories for patients that find the right path and commit themselves to healing.  You may have heard about Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) at this point, but here is an additional resource with some excellent info on the subject: The basic principles behind Dialectical Behavioral Therapy .  Finding a therapist who specializes in this treatment could be the next step forward for you and your daughter.

You might also wish to check out What can a parent do? and our Parenting a son or daughter suffering from BPD board.  There are plenty of parents on the board who can share their experiences in dealing with a child suffering from BPD, and they know exactly what you are going through.

Please keep posting, Parkfriend.  We are here to help and support you!

[Rapt Reader]

Hi, parkfriend 

I'd like to join Hazelrah in welcoming you to this site, and encourage you to check out the links he gave you; there really are people here who will know exactly what you are going through and they will be able to give you plenty of support and advice... .

I'd like to let you know that I am here because of my adult (36) son who was just diagnosed with BPD in April 2013, and after reading all I could on this site, and learning the communication skills and other techniques that you will find at the links Hazelrah gave you, I've been able to help my son get the therapy he needs. And he is doing great! Honest... .There really can be light at the end of the tunnel 

[Thursday]

Hi parkfriend,

Welcome!

I think you will find much help here!

Is your daughter seeking help for her issues ( has she been told the dx?), is she ready for some changes in her life? If yes, fantastic!

If not, YOU will find so much here to help you help her. I've really gotten a ton of information by clicking on the "subject du jour" at the top of the page (it is in brown). The topic changes- right now it is 50 questions and you will gain insight just from answering them yourself.

The person in my life with BPD is my Step Daughter. She is 22. I imagine you and I have some similar experiences in dealing with a BPD person of this age.

Best to you and your daughter and I hope to read more from you!

Thursday