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Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
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Painted Black turns agains the pwBPD
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Topic: Painted Black turns agains the pwBPD (Read 350 times)
TakingWingAtLast
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Relationship status: Moved out for good on Nov. 16, 2013.
Posts: 229
Painted Black turns agains the pwBPD
«
on:
December 06, 2013, 12:57:33 PM »
All,
I know we often bear the brunt of the expwBPD machinations, but take heart perhaps. Sometimes, it can really turn against them!
On Wednesday night at a tennis party that we were both attending, she literally told everyone there that I had affairs with men for a year and a half while we were together. This occurred while I was in the same room no less! Talk about the painted black in spades! Talk about being outed!
However, this apparently backfired as I found out later that many were offended that she brought that up to them. In fact, a woman who had told me directly that she was going to remain friends with expwBPD, specifically came to me at the party to say hello and talk about her diet plans. I didn't know at that time what had occurred, so I had simply attributed it to the simple kindness of this woman (which is why I had approached her to remain friends with me if at all possible). But later other friends approached me after the party and informed me what had happened. In fact they specifically reported that the others at the party "think less of [ex] as a result."
Wow, it just goes to show that bashing your ex is a bad idea and that perhaps the bashing you get might actually act in your best interest!
Frankly, I can't think of a better example to help me detach!
D
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RecycledNoMore
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 457
Re: Painted Black turns agains the pwBPD
«
Reply #1 on:
December 06, 2013, 09:48:00 PM »
Dpendberg
I am so happy you posted that, I was about to do something really stupid, i.e ranting and raving my " truth", on the uBPDxs facebook page, which I have steered well clear of till I woke up today, feeling angry about his lies.
I will keep him blocked.
I choose me.
Thanks for the sanity reminder.
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Aussie0zborn
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 803
Re: Painted Black turns agains the pwBPD
«
Reply #2 on:
December 07, 2013, 09:13:46 AM »
I wouldn't rant on Facebook or even acknowledge them. You can find other ways to vent (a therapist is good). Not acknowledging them is the best thing you can do. It does get to them at some point and at the end you will feel proud of yourself for not having stooped to their low level. Keep your head held high.
My stbx BPD wife called me three times at 1.00am even though she has an interim RO against me which I am defending in court and is supposedly "scared" of me. She was drunk and it sounded like she wanted to chat - I hung up the first time when I realised it was her and didn't answer the next two calls. I reported it to the police and my lawyer has written to her lawyer about it. Avoid getting tangled up any further in their mess.
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free-n-clear
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Not to be resuscitated.
Posts: 564
Re: Painted Black turns agains the pwBPD
«
Reply #3 on:
December 07, 2013, 09:48:16 AM »
I'm guessing they can't help themselves when it comes to lying, whether it's to you or about you. My uBPDxgf, who is now living at the local pub, put the word around that I had broken into her room. Obviously if I had, then at the very least I'd have been barred from the pub by management. It obviously didn't occur to her that everyone she told would notice that I haven't been! Remember that while we may never win an argument, we will ALWAYS win the credibility war!
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