protecting my family just got real.

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

I have been trying hard to not engage my exBPDw but she brought the kids back from a holiday trip and managed to wear me down. She asked to stay the night because it was so late and feeling sorry for her I agreed.  Then she asked if we could talk about the kids. I hdld my ground till she turned on the water. She started the blame devaluation and name calling quick. I said time out and took a restroom break.  She went outside so I figured she gave up. Wrong! She came back growling and I realized she took something. She started a fight and tried to run away in her car so I grabbed her keys. She was in no condition to drive and it got bad. She left in handcuffs 4 hours ago and Im sick. She has hit me plenty before and I never called but I said thats enough. I hate myself for hurting my family.

[lost not dead]

I have been trying hard to not engage my exBPDw but she brought the kids back from a holiday trip and managed to wear me down. She asked to stay the night because it was so late and feeling sorry for her I agreed.  Then she asked if we could talk about the kids. I hdld my ground till she turned on the water. She started the blame devaluation and name calling quick. I said time out and took a restroom break.  She went outside so I figured she gave up. Wrong! She came back growling and I realized she took something. She started a fight and tried to run away in her car so I grabbed her keys. She was in no condition to drive and it got bad. She left in handcuffs 4 hours ago and Im sick. She has hit me plenty before and I never called but I said thats enough. I hate myself for hurting my family.

[arn131arn]

Don't feel bad, I wish I had done what you did sooner.

You did the right thing, and your main priority Should be to protect your family.

Good luck, and remember they have an innate ability to make us feel shame and guilt.

[heartandwhole]

it got bad. She left in handcuffs 4 hours ago and Im sick. She has hit me plenty before and I never called but I said thats enough. I hate myself for hurting my family.

Lost, I'm really sorry – what a stressful situation!  Are you ok? 

[santa]

Put a wooden stake in her heart. 

[Learning_curve74]

I'm so sorry, lost... . 

It's not a situation anybody wants to find themselves in. You have to hang in there and get through it.