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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: Potential situation with an exBPD considering job loss  (Read 442 times)
iluminati
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 1571



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« on: April 11, 2014, 08:42:34 PM »

Here's my situation.  My ex with BPD moved out about a month and a half ago.  We were planning on splitting up after the end of the lease as of May 1st, but she moved out early and, thanks to some financial good fortune and negotiations with the landlord, I'm where I'm at until July 1st.  Anyway, when she moved out, she wasn't sure if she was going to have a job in a few months, which surprised me but didn't, if that makes sense.

Anyway, I get an email from the lawyers handling the mediation that she got 2 weeks notice from her job that they were letting her go.  Now she worked a temp job for the local government, and she knew she could be let go from 5 months ago at any time.  Now I'm nervous about what she's going to do, especially since she never fully accounted for her stuff in her house.  (According to her, she said she'd get it out "by the time I moved out".) 

I get the feeling I'm going to get a charm offensive, plus a lot of other BS in terms of the final settlement.  Any advice on how I should handle both?
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