Not sure what I'm looking for here: thoughts, reflections, guidance.
About two weeks NC. My ex texts me asking "are you calling me." I say no (I wasn't); I had decided to respond to initiations on her part in a dispassionate way, and it's been helpful. After awhile I write back (mistake 1) "what was that text about?" She says "someone from work was calling me and hanging up. I don't mean to insinuate you're creepy, but I wanted to make sure
" Of course, I wasn't calling her, and I am not and have never been creepy. I have no idea if anyone was calling her (plausible that her bosses were I suppose), but I'd don't real care. I decided to leave emotion out if it and say "no, it wasn't me."
Sadly, emotion got the best of me, and I wrote "why would I do that? I'm kind of insulted" (mistake 2, broke my own rule). At this point, she writes "I have no idea. You've done weird things in the past. So have I." I have never done anything weird in the past, at all, so I say "like what?" And then she says "Oh my god. I'm at the gym. Have a nice weekend." Fight ensues.
For a brief period I felt like ___, then I felt like "you don't need anyone in your life who claims you're her 'best friend in the world' then later treats you like this and makes you crazy." And I've been going back and forth on those all night.
There's no specific question here, but maybe you can dig one out. I'm just looking for insight. I wish I had left it be, but I couldn't control the emotions that the devaluation ("creepy?" provoked in me.
