Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
June 16, 2024, 06:10:43 AM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Experts share their discoveries
[video]
100
Caretaking - What is it all about?
Margalis Fjelstad, PhD
Blame - why we do it?
Brené Brown, PhD
Family dynamics matter.
Alan Fruzzetti, PhD
A perspective on BPD
Ivan Spielberg, PhD
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
> Topic:
Parents tried to settle things
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: Parents tried to settle things (Read 361 times)
Mr. Black
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 20
Parents tried to settle things
«
on:
August 16, 2014, 02:53:12 PM »
Hi,
I have a uDBPDw and had filed for divorce. We are separated for about 2.5 yrs now. My parents could not understand what was happening and why was the divorce taking so long. During this holiday weekend they came to meet me to try and resolve the issue and patch-up things.
A little background:
1) Divorce filed by me (husband)
2) She does not want alimony / maintenance but does not want to give divorce mutually and we are going in for a contested divorce.
3) No child or property in divorce.
The courts had sent us to some court Councillors who tried explaining that fighting a divorce case is like loosing precious yrs in court and we should mutually settle it. My wife stated that she will not give me a divorce.
Trying to give marriage a second chance I genuinely tried reconciling with her. These recon. talks are on for about 8 months now. I even prepared a reconciliation agreement which was not acceptable to her.
Back to Present:
1) We again re-initiate the reconciliation talks.
2) My Parents come to meet me and call her home to try and reconcile
During the day long discussion, we try to make her see her mistakes, by asking her the issues she was facing. On issues we asked her to give examples, not a single example could be given by her. We tried showing her that her issues were unfounded on reality and she kept justifying her acts with circular discussions and rhetoric.
My one and only condition for reconciliation was that she should go into therapy which she flatly refused, but kept stating that she was sorry and has changed. (there was no remorse whatsoever).
Ques)
1) How do I get my parents off my back. Atleast after the whole day's discussion they have started seeing my point of view
2) I genuinely wanted to reconcile. How do i get her to see the issues and start therapy?
Logged
RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.
woofhound
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 166
Re: Parents tried to settle things
«
Reply #1 on:
August 16, 2014, 03:16:14 PM »
Sadly, I can't offer you any advice. For me it was very much a catch22 type situation. The more I insisted that my uBPDex had a problem the further she would push me away, yet, not addressing the issue was making for an emotional train wreck of a life. I would say intervention... .but... .I don't know if that could work with a BPD. It might just end up pushing them away further as well.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
> Topic:
Parents tried to settle things
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...