Death and the BPD

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

My BPDw had 2 daughters, 1 of which who passed away at the age of 7 1/2, and this was during her 1st marriage. Unfortunately, her marriage did not last too much longer. She saw me as a person who validated her emotions while her ex did not or was not able to due to his own grief.

Now that she has been married to me for the past 13 years, now that she has had traditional and non-traditional therapies, and is feeling better, nevertheless, she still takes out her anger, frustration, her negativity now once in a while, but it is extremely biting when she is verbally abusive.

As far as death and the BPD, how many of you can attribute at least in part your BPD's behavior to a death of a young one? If this is the case for you, how do you handle this kind of situation, or do you?

[Samuel S.]

My BPDw had 2 daughters, 1 of which who passed away at the age of 7 1/2, and this was during her 1st marriage. Unfortunately, her marriage did not last too much longer. She saw me as a person who validated her emotions while her ex did not or was not able to due to his own grief.

Now that she has been married to me for the past 13 years, now that she has had traditional and non-traditional therapies, and is feeling better, nevertheless, she still takes out her anger, frustration, her negativity now once in a while, but it is extremely biting when she is verbally abusive.

As far as death and the BPD, how many of you can attribute at least in part your BPD's behavior to a death of a young one? If this is the case for you, how do you handle this kind of situation, or do you?