Any ideas about letting anxiety move into sadness/grief?

[Depression = 72% of members]

I feel stuck in anxious, self-loathing, confusing feelings.  I'm SO tired of feeling this way.  I think the worst part for me of breaking up has been the tremendous feelings of anxiety in the pit of my stomach.

It seems like it would be better to lean in and just be SAD, ANGRY, whatever.  Instead, the "I'm not sure how I feel, I'm not sure what to think" nagging, subtle feelings (that have been around intermittently throughout the relationship, btw) seem to have taken up permanent residence in my body.

Does anyone have any advice about moving past this part and allowing the natural grieving process to happen?

Feeling so stuck and miserable, ruminating, just makes me more unhappy.

[SickofMe]

I feel stuck in anxious, self-loathing, confusing feelings.  I'm SO tired of feeling this way.  I think the worst part for me of breaking up has been the tremendous feelings of anxiety in the pit of my stomach.

It seems like it would be better to lean in and just be SAD, ANGRY, whatever.  Instead, the "I'm not sure how I feel, I'm not sure what to think" nagging, subtle feelings (that have been around intermittently throughout the relationship, btw) seem to have taken up permanent residence in my body.

Does anyone have any advice about moving past this part and allowing the natural grieving process to happen?

Feeling so stuck and miserable, ruminating, just makes me more unhappy.

[JAC_flgirl]

I am almost 3 mths out of a 5 yr relationship, so I understand.  All I can say is for me, I try to stay busy.  My ex BPD is one seriously messed up man, so I look at him like he is massively screwy and its his problem.  I tried to go on a couple of dates, but realized I was so not ready.  It is a day to day process.

[Mutt]

Hi SickofMe,

I'm sorry your feeling stuck. I can't tell how long what your feeling will last. You were in a r/s for 2. 5 years and you have a history together. It's different for everyone. Are you in T? A good T and these boards helped me through grieving.

Hang in there.

--Mutt