Question about lieing

[jammo1989]

My ex BPD seemed to lie about EVERYTHING, she told me she had only slept with 2 people, lied to her ex all the time, when we were together, but my question is, is it NPDs or BPDs who lie about fabricated self image.  For example, after we split up, she told me about how well she was doing, how she now finally has a job and is making £7.50 an  in a care home, also saying things like i spent £800 on the kids for xmas, said she was going on holiday to Australia which cost over £800 for flights (shes 24 with 2 kids btw), and i later found out through a mutual friend that none of this is true, why do they fabricate lies? surely it cant be to impress us, if the relationship is over, so why do they tend to this?

[Blimblam]

My ex BPD seemed to lie about EVERYTHING, she told me she had only slept with 2 people, lied to her ex all the time, when we were together, but my question is, is it NPDs or BPDs who lie about fabricated self image.  For example, after we split up, she told me about how well she was doing, how she now finally has a job and is making £7.50 an  in a care home, also saying things like i spent £800 on the kids for xmas, said she was going on holiday to Australia which cost over £800 for flights (shes 24 with 2 kids btw), and i later found out through a mutual friend that none of this is true, why do they fabricate lies? surely it cant be to impress us, if the relationship is over, so why do they tend to this?

I think they want to prove to us they don't need us and their life is great. Oh and they are pathological liars, especially to people they split black or just to suit their needs and not have to deal with things. When I was with my ex it was always some friend that was so needy never her.

[fred6]

My ex BPD seemed to lie about EVERYTHING, she told me she had only slept with 2 people, lied to her ex all the time, when we were together, but my question is, is it NPDs or BPDs who lie about fabricated self image.  For example, after we split up, she told me about how well she was doing, how she now finally has a job and is making £7.50 an  in a care home, also saying things like i spent £800 on the kids for xmas, said she was going on holiday to Australia which cost over £800 for flights (shes 24 with 2 kids btw), and i later found out through a mutual friend that none of this is true, why do they fabricate lies? surely it cant be to impress us, if the relationship is over, so why do they tend to this?

With those lies, it's like she's saying that she's doing fine and doesn't need you to take care of her. My ex wouldn't let me do anything for her at the end of our relationship. I think she was trying to prove to herself that she could do everything for herself after I moved out.

[MrConfusedWithItAll]

I don't think the intention is to impress you rather than make you feel inadequate.  She is saying that now you are out of the picture her life is coming together - it was all your fault she wasn't doing better.  Of course, as you have pointed out - it is all a falsehood and so you are not the inadequate one.

[jammo1989]

I don't think the intention is to impress you rather than make you feel inadequate.  She is saying that now you are out of the picture her life is coming together - it was all your fault she wasn't doing better.  Of course, as you have pointed out - it is all a falsehood and so you are not the inadequate one.

This hits home, the day she finally cut me off completely she was saying how she finally has a job now, then said you coming down every weekend stopped me from working, then started saying how she wants to move and that her 6 year old agrees.  When in reality to all this shes still sat at home claiming child support and benefits, still living the same life that she is now.   

[clydegriffith]

They lie to present hemselves as something they are not. They don't have a sense of who they really are and just change the role they are playing from time to time. The bpx started off as a poor women being physically abused, then she went to the rich suburban chick then to struggling mom.