new here

[maddykins]

Hi, I'm new.  I just found this website today.  As I began reading things about BPD and watched the initial video, I felt a sense of relief to find a description that fit my relationship.  Something I can read about.  Something I can work on.  I felt like maybe I am not alone. 

I have been married for 2 years, and I feel lost and and angry and helpless.  I feel like I am losing myself trying to be what I think my husband wants and needs me to be.  I do not know whether he actually has BPD, but he certainly has many of the traits.  He has been previously diagnosed with depression and anxiety.  I feel emotionally drained and resentful most of the time and I am trying to figure out what to do.

Thank you for listening.  I am hoping to find some ideas and direction here.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[joshbjoshb]

Hi

Sorry you are here. But at least there are many here so you will have company

Before worrying about your husband start with yourself. What makes you happy? What can elevate your mood? Do some good things for yourself. Be nice and kind towards yourself. Make yourself feel valuable.

Much of the work for you in term of BPD is going to be what YOU can do, not what HE SHOULD do. But with the right tools, you can improve a lot of your situation. Although it might never be the ideal relationship you were dreaming of.

Good luck. Keep on reading. Knowledge is power.