This is something i used to tell the BPDx all the time. Myself and others would always help her out as she has a bunch of young kids and quite frankly needs as much help as she could get. She's never greatful for the help she does get and has this feeling that everyone is somehow obliged to help her because of all her kids. I recall once shortly after b/u when she approached me about wanting to get a job and working out a schedule where i would watch the child that is mine. I politley refused to enter into any such agreement as i saw no good would come from it. It would be pretty much giving her an open invitation to drop the child on me whenever she pleased and there is no doubt in my mind that it would be no time before the instances in which she would want me to take the child would fall out the parameters of any agreeemnt we would make. I have a very good, demanding job and i was not going to jepoardize that so she could work retail somewhere just to be out of the house. I'm glad i did this because a couple of months later she had to move back home which is 7 hours away
. I wasn't able to truly start healing until she was gone.
