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Author Topic: Is There and end for all this or we're stuck in remuniating ?  (Read 392 times)
guy4caligirl
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 692


« on: November 26, 2014, 06:51:41 AM »

I wonder if our exes spend that much time thinking of us, I doubt it or do they ?

Are these thoughts going to go away when we start dating again ?

Let's say a non BPD left suddenly would we feel the same way ?

Is this ever bad period in our existing going to fade away and resume a normal life ?

BPD s  wish to have  a normal day or two in their lives like we do ,are we giving them the good example or we're joining them in that black hole ?

It just a thought... .

What and why are we thinking this way it's not healthy is it ?

Are we becoming BPD's ourselves ?

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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 835



« Reply #1 on: November 26, 2014, 07:06:23 AM »

I wonder if our exes spend that much time thinking of us, I doubt it or do they ?

Mine? No.

Out of sight, out of mind.

That goes for his own mother, and his own children.

Excerpt
Are these thoughts going to go away when we start dating again ?

No. You have to eliminate them now.

I did so by replacing bad thoughts / bad thought patterns with good-healthy-future planning thoughts.

I pray, all the time.  Out loud when I am alone / driving too.

You have to stop with the old before you can begin anything with new.

Excerpt
Let's say a non BPD left suddenly would we feel the same way ?

Yes

Excerpt
Is this ever bad period in our existing going to fade away and resume a normal life ?

Yes, but it takes work. A lot of hard work on OUR part.

Replacing thoughts, habits, patterns.

Blocking all communication.

Digging deep into our selves to find out what "our root" issue is; address it, and deal with it.

Never ever rely on another human being for your happiness... .

Time is not a magic eraser. We have to do the hard work.

Excerpt
BPD s  wish to have  a normal day or two in their lives like we do ,are we giving them the good example or we're joining them in that black hole ?

If you are not a trained and licensed mental health professional, that a BPD has sought you out for help, then all you can do is join them in the black hole.

Take your time and energy healing YOU.

You are responsible for you and no one else... .heal you first.

Excerpt
It just a thought... .

What and why are we thinking this way it's not healthy is it ?

Are we becoming BPD's ourselves ?

No it is not healthy.

Arrogant at the least (that we have some 'super power' or other such nonsense to reach an unreachable person)

Destructive at best (like hanging a Mill Stone around our necks and jumping into the Sea).

We have to stop dead in our tracks and turn around.

Run, don't walk away.

Read, study research why we tick, why we do what we do... .etc.

Seek out help / tools to correct behavior, thoughts, patterns.

Live with boundaries, and live a whole, full, healthy life.

THAT has to be our goal, or we will be devoured.

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