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Author Topic: Feeling unappreciated by exBPDbf  (Read 411 times)
Beach_Babe
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
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« on: December 21, 2014, 10:51:42 PM »
Backup. That's all I am to him . I don't know if I can learn to be OK with that. I want to stay, it hurts so much but always always I am reminded
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Blimblam
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« Reply #1 on: December 21, 2014, 10:53:28 PM »
I know that feel.  I couldn't do it.  Too many emotions involved and being taken for granted and held in contempt sucks.
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Beach_Babe
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« Reply #2 on: December 22, 2014, 02:22:46 AM »
I can't do it anymore. Tonight I made the mistake of trying to contact him and got treated like a nuisance and a stalker again. We haven't spoken in 4 days and he was so upset I asked for a call. Then called me screaming he was tired why cant I call tomorrow and saying I was his "mistress of abuse"  I can't call him tomorrow it will be blocked again, I know the pattern.
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Blimblam
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« Reply #3 on: December 22, 2014, 02:33:03 AM »
Yeah when they get abusive they lose all respect for us. After we've been split And they know they are hurting us and yet we stay around.  They don't respect that.  They may pitty is but that doesn't stop them from being abusive. It's difficult to face the reality of being split and that the part of them we loved is no longer available to is any longer.
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Beach_Babe
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« Reply #4 on: December 22, 2014, 02:41:48 AM »
I am physically sick. What is wrong with him? Even old exes of mine have been in touch with kind words or regards?
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Blimblam
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« Reply #5 on: December 22, 2014, 02:45:10 AM »
He knows he has you hooked. He likes knowing he has you there that he is in control of the distance yet he resents you for making him have to hurt you.  At this point it's about him having control over a backup source of narcissistic supply while he runs around doing whatever he wants.
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Mutt
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« Reply #6 on: December 22, 2014, 02:45:50 AM »
Quote from: Beach_Babe on December 22, 2014, 02:41:48 AM
I am physically sick. What is wrong with him? Even old exes of mine have been in touch with kind words or regards?

I'm sorry to hear that. I can relate to feeling physically sick with my ex. It's not fun.

It's the walking on eggshells feeling  Don't be hard on yourself. Check the board to the right Beach_Babe. Detachment leads to freedom.

Hang in there.


--Mutt
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"Let go or be dragged" -Zen proverb
Beach_Babe
Also known as FriedaB
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Relationship status: Single
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« Reply #7 on: December 22, 2014, 02:54:55 AM »
Mutt:  No I mean physically sick as in needing heart surgery. What kind of a person abandons you at a time like this?

Blimblam: why? What's the point of that?
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Blimblam
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« Reply #8 on: December 22, 2014, 03:00:14 AM »
Quote from: Beach_Babe on December 22, 2014, 02:54:55 AM
No I mean physically sick as in needing heart surgery. What kind of a person abandons you at a time like this?

A person who feels guilty and ashamed that they are more concerned that they don't get to be the victim when you are hurt. So they are mad at you for making them feel shamed and now you get to be the bad guy/ pathetic and contain their negative emotions for them to scoff at.

It's pretty twisted stuff.  I'm sorry your going through this!
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Mutt
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« Reply #9 on: December 22, 2014, 03:13:25 AM »
Quote from: Beach_Babe on December 22, 2014, 02:54:55 AM
Mutt:  No I mean physically sick as in needing heart surgery. What kind of a person abandons you at a time like this?

Blimblam: why? What's the point of that?

I'm sorry.

Also I got it wrong. I apologize.

He's not showing empathy or sympathy. That's tough

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"Let go or be dragged" -Zen proverb
Beach_Babe
Also known as FriedaB
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Relationship status: Single
Posts: 2412
« Reply #10 on: December 22, 2014, 03:17:43 AM »
Even past exes have sent regards or kind words. Oh yeah he is mentally l keep forgetting.
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