A Christmas miracle

[david]

S11 was diagnosed with eczema a little over six years ago. I noticed, around five years ago, a few things that led me to believe our water was contributing to his flare ups. I installed a water softener and a dechlorinator in my residence. I researched a lot of articles about eczema and talked to several specialist that a doc friend of mine respected.

Our summer schedule is week on / week off. During the summer his skin started to get much better. I was convinced that the water treatment was helping him a lot and emailed ex to let her know what I found. She is a nurse so that led to a trigger for her and it became impossible to attempt to communicate with her about any of this. I tried a few times and gave up. August of 2012 I filed for additional time with kids because they were doing over 90% of their homework when with me and ex had majority of time during the school year with the boys.

We finalized a custody eval about six months ago. One topic that I brought up was S11's eczema and what I was doing about it. I knew it would probably trigger ex. It did but the evaluator got to see first hand what I was dealing with. Turning lemons into lemonade.

Went to court in Sept and the judge actually continued this time because my atty had soo much evidence it was going to take most of the day and there wasn't enough time that day. Judge ordered a co parent counselor. I brought up the eczema topic again at one of the counseling meetings and explained some of the things I discovered and my reasoning. I actually looked straight at ex and explained that this wasn't about her or me being right but about S11. The co parent counselor intervened and kept ex calm. I was calm the entire time.

Ex tried a few times to get an additional continuance since that time and was told no each time.

S11 had a dermatologist appointment the other day. Ex and I were both there. The dermatologist explained to ex that my thinking made sense. His explanation was more for a layman which triggered ex a little and she snapped that she was a nurse and didn't need to be talked to that way. She did control herself though so that was a positive in my way of looking at things. The doc gave a prescription for a new med that was to be used for only eight days. By then his skin should clear up to the point that it could be managed by moisturizers, brief baths or showers, and paying attention.

I sent an email to ex asking about the med since the boys are with me and she was getting the script filled since she was a nurse. I told her the names of the system I used and the dechlorinator I used after trying three different ones. She actually replied that she is getting a plumber and will be talking to him about it. Not sure if it is true but I have it in an email and will be giving it to my atty.

It took six years but this is the first time she actually acknowledged that I may be on to something. I have never been close to being right about anything before.

[divva]

You have every right to celebrate this small victory,  david! Only people with a pwBPD in their lives can  understand how happy such a thing can make us feel! Keep strong! Merry Christmas!

[livednlearned]

Merry christmas david! Your ex gave you a big      

[enlighten me]

Hi David it sounds like you have handled it well and are getting good resukts.

I want to jump away from BPD as eczma is something my son suffered with. It was so bad that he had weeping sores. We tried everything. One day we were told about a porridge sock.

Basically you pour porridge oats into a sock and hang it from the hot bath tap. Run the bath through the sock. You can squeeze out the sock to release more.

Within a week my sons eczma had cleared.

Give it a go. Ive told a number of people about this and all have said it worked. Let me know if you try it and it works.