Am I being played or Does He Really Care?

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

Hi BPD Family,

I've been with my boyfriend for about 1.5 years. During that time we have split a few times because I have had a strong suspicion he has been unfaithful, although he vehemently denied it all.

For the past month or so he has been distant, and our love life has cooled off.

About a couple of weeks ago he said he still wanted to be a couple, but needed some space and he didn't know how long that would be.

I'm confused and I just don't know if I can hang in any longer and wait for him. A psychologist I spoke with said he is probably testing the waters with someone and just keeping me waiting.

I need some clarity on this situation. 

[MsBriteSide]

Hi BPD Family,

I've been with my boyfriend for about 1.5 years. During that time we have split a few times because I have had a strong suspicion he has been unfaithful, although he vehemently denied it all.

For the past month or so he has been distant, and our love life has cooled off.

About a couple of weeks ago he said he still wanted to be a couple, but needed some space and he didn't know how long that would be.

I'm confused and I just don't know if I can hang in any longer and wait for him. A psychologist I spoke with said he is probably testing the waters with someone and just keeping me waiting.

I need some clarity on this situation. 

[Lucky Jim]

Hey MsBriteSide, If you are on this forum, presumably you suspect that your boyfriend has BPD.  What makes you think so?  Fill us in a little more, when you can.  LuckyJim

[Loosestrife]

It is unfair for anyone to be left hanging in limbo. I would just tell him you accept what he is saying you think its best you have NC as you have feelings for him and this is difficult for you, and then if you can, try to move on. My advice is jot to let hime have all the control and set your limits and boundaries now.

[MsBriteSide]

Now he is admitting to cheating. He said he feels like he missed out as he had children quite young and then withdrew from life and became a hermit for 10 years, where he hardly ever went out and didn't have friends. The other thing he mentioned being, he didn't feel like he was good enough for me as I'm a professional and a high achiever and he works 2 days per week in a comic book shop.