Probably leaving soon

[vickmeister]

I've posted here lots before. Mostly on the "Staying" board, I think.

Then a couple years ago I posted a success story. The knowledge gained here, the communication tools learned are invaluable. They make an impossible situation doable.

But it might cost your soul a bigger price than you can pay. I can't continue the relationship w my particular pwBPD. Too many other factors pushed my decision to weigh the cost, foremost among them a daughter.in.law with stage 4 brain cancer. She is the mother of my grandson, age 4. Too much chaos in our home for a little guy who needs to have some time away from illness and the harsh reality that cancer brings.

There can always be things that happen to derail our best intentions w our particular pwBPD, diagnosed or not, in our lives. And derail those same intentions in any relationship.

Just saying, there can be a cost you may not anticipate paying, whatever path you choose. I know you all know that.

[Lucky Jim]

Agree, vickmeister.  The price is high.  I came close to destroying myself emotionally, physically and financially in my marriage to a pwBPD.  Worst of all, I lost myself for a while there, which was for me a terrible feeling.  Yet the ordeal made me stronger and a more authentic person, though my marriage ended in the process.  That's OK.  I tried as hard as I could for as long as I could.  LuckyJim