Turkish when she fell and hit her head was she with you or the ex? I may be just paranoid but, when I hear of them making something up like with your s, I jump to she is setting up a situation, an accusation. :)o your kids go to school or daycare? Where someone else sees that they are fine? Was it hard to sit at the drs and just not roll your eyes?
She was with her mom. They were visiting relatives. The story was believable because D2 is adventurous and climbs. We've been open about sharing these things since last summer and uBPDx waited 4 hours to call me when D2 fell and broke her collarbone. I started throwing back what I endured, "what's this gash or scratch?" I only caught her in a lie of ommision once when S5 told me her bf accidentally rammed a toy car into his sister's face and it left a nasty mark.
About 2 months ago, their mom asked me to wipe our son's backside due to the redness (something I've rarely noticed... .). I told her I wasn't going to do that. The other day, he had to poop as we were about to leave grandma's (Ex's mom, who babysits the kids while we work). He kept calling for her. I went to the bathroom, gave him some to and said,."son, you're 5 years old. You're a big boy. You can do this yourself." He started protesting until I said,."you're going to do this yourself. Grandma's not coming." And he did.
The dominant emotional state of The Hermit is fear. My Ex gets a lot of her anxieties from her mom (and she knows this!), but it's tough to break out of decades of conditioning. Raising babies... . sucked. I wasn't even allowed to bathe them until they were past 6 months old. The only real act of DV that I witnessed was when I let S5, then about 7 or 8 months old, fall asleep on my shoulder as his mom was cooking dinner. I thought,."oh, no... ." I went into the kitchen to confess my sin, and as I walked out, she slammed the fridge door so hard that the door contents fell out and made a huge mess on the floor. Like a chump, I put the baby in his crib and got on my knees to clean up the mess and broken glass while she sat at the table angrily eating. The trigger was a break in the script, and if our son didn't get a bath, he'd get sick or something
My BPD hermit mom didn't project many of her fears on me, thankfully. Then again, I'm adopted, and one can't discount the genetic component which can contribute to BPD. Nor freewill
