Devastated difficult partner left with no explanation

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Hello,

My relationship has ended. My difficult partner has text me to leave with no explanation,  is cruel demanding & hateful.  I did nothing but love this person with every ounce of my being. He had been starting fights over the last weeks but then would be loving again. A month ago on our last night together we were relaxing together,  discussing up coming plans, somehow he twisted my words into a serious insult. I tried to calm him as usual,  he cont to yell, get more angry & storm out. I went away a cpl days saying I love you, not leaving you but we need help. A week went by, not a word from him... .then I reached out lovingly. He said Move out, I'm not happy. I moved. Alone. I am fighting lyme disease & now am 300 miles from my treatment program. He knows this. I have no understanding,  no closure. Nothing. This is the man who said he wanted a family, a marriage & a future with me. I am devastated.  No answers.  Can't make sense, in total agony. I tried to be strong changed my # & my email to protect myself. Now nothing but indifference & rage.

Help.

[JewelsLives]

Hello,

My relationship has ended. My difficult partner has text me to leave with no explanation,  is cruel demanding & hateful.  I did nothing but love this person with every ounce of my being. He had been starting fights over the last weeks but then would be loving again. A month ago on our last night together we were relaxing together,  discussing up coming plans, somehow he twisted my words into a serious insult. I tried to calm him as usual,  he cont to yell, get more angry & storm out. I went away a cpl days saying I love you, not leaving you but we need help. A week went by, not a word from him... .then I reached out lovingly. He said Move out, I'm not happy. I moved. Alone. I am fighting lyme disease & now am 300 miles from my treatment program. He knows this. I have no understanding,  no closure. Nothing. This is the man who said he wanted a family, a marriage & a future with me. I am devastated.  No answers.  Can't make sense, in total agony. I tried to be strong changed my # & my email to protect myself. Now nothing but indifference & rage.

Help.

[Mayjar68]

First of all I want to say sorry that you are going through such a terrible time !  Things must be very raw and confusing for you. Things will get better in time but right now that does nothing to soothe your pain. You are in the right place to help you get through this horrible time. This place has helped me and many other to come to terms with what has happened to you. Everyone here has suffered at the hands of someone who suffers from this affliction. We try to help each understand what these people has done to us and how to get back to the people we once was before we met them. Believe that things will get better and the pain of what has happened to you will ease. We are all here to listen and help you through this throughly horrible time. You will see that you will gain insight and know that you are not alone in your pain

[Mike-X]

I am sorry that your relationship has ended in this way. You are not alone. As I am sure you will find by reading the stories of other members, many have gone through very dramatic relationships that ended abruptly and painfully.

In addition to the posts by members, there are several good articles on this Website that might help give you some perspective on relationships with people with BPD:

https://bpdfamily.com/portfolio-broken

How a Borderline Relationship Evolves might be a good one to start with:

https://bpdfamily.com/content/how-borderline-relationship-evolves

Although it does sound as if your partner displayed BPD traits and behaviors, was he ever formally diagnosed?

Again, I am sorry for the pain, lack of closure, and mixed feelings that you are experiencing.

Mike-X

[ForeverDad]

I'm s sorry to hear what you're going through.  I have a relative with Lyme and it is devastating, until recently she thought it was the End, though now there are new meds and she's in a holding pattern healthwise.  I don't know everything she's done but I think she said that after infusions for 9 months, doxycyline I think, it stopped working and now she's on low dose Naltrexone and serrapeptase (to break down the protective film on the Lyme bacteria).

You have to accept that if your spouse is not working with you, then you need to make your decisions based on those facts.  Sad but the reality.

[Mutt]

Hi JewelsLives,



I can understand how agonizing that would be when you last saw your partner 30 days ago and received a text that it's over. It has to be hard that you're 300 miles from treatment.

I am sorry that you're going through all of this.

A r/s break-up with someone that suffers from BPD can be confusing, painful and chaotic. Many members here can relate and can offer guidance and support. It helps to talk.

Do you have family and friends where you moved to 300 miles away for support?