Hello

[TGSprig]

Hi all,

I'm newly married to a woman who was diagnosed with BPD by our therapist of five years.  She rejected the diagnosis and quit the therapist but we still went through with the wedding.

It's just really tough.  I don't ever feel like I can talk about anything honestly and she is such an emotional roller coaster that I often find myself exhausted and feeling like a piece of crap.  The whole thing but makes me sad... .for her mostly.

Anyway, I guess I just needed to type that out.

Thanks for listening!

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[thisagain]

Hello!   I just joined too but I wanted to say hi and that I know those feelings very well! There are a lot of great resources here, in the Lessons thread and elsewhere.

[LilMe]

Welcome TGSprig!

I'm sorry you are in this situation. Unfortunately many of us here can relate. The Lessons on the right of this page are great! I have read them many times and it took a while to really internalize them, but they really do help. Working on myself, not participating in the crazy arguments, and not taking it all so personally has helped my relationship soo much. It helps to read and vent or ask questions on this board. There are a bunch of pretty awesome folks here!

[EaglesJuju]

Hi TGSprig,



I understand how tough the emotional rollercoaster is to cope with.    It is very exhausting.

Many people with BPD (pwBPD) have issues with shame. Low self-worth, self-loathing, and self-esteem are related to shame. This is a large reason why pwBPD are hypersensitive to criticism. The label of BPD reminds them of their own shame and self-loathing, hence why she rejected the diagnosis. 

Sharing your story really helps, especially when you are feeling worn out from your pwBPD.  What specific things are you finding tough?

Looking forward to reading your response.