Girlfriend scared of intimacy

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

I find that once my girlfriend has spent several nights with me, she inevitably finds some excuse to leave so she can be alone by herself. After a number of days alone, she will come running back. I find this to be rather unnerving, as this cycle repeats itself each week. I've talked to her about it, and she claims that she has trust issues, yet I'm starting to wonder if she also has a fear of intimacy as well. She refuses to get help, so how do I deal with this other than walking away from the relationship?

[nevereverends]

I find that once my girlfriend has spent several nights with me, she inevitably finds some excuse to leave so she can be alone by herself. After a number of days alone, she will come running back. I find this to be rather unnerving, as this cycle repeats itself each week. I've talked to her about it, and she claims that she has trust issues, yet I'm starting to wonder if she also has a fear of intimacy as well. She refuses to get help, so how do I deal with this other than walking away from the relationship?

[formflier]

So... .why not encourage her to take the space... .be proactive about it.  Use the time apart to enjoy yourself and let her enjoy herself. 

As you said... she comes back.

I totally see how this could be unnerving if unplanned... .

So... plan for it.  This is who she is.

Thoughts?

FF

[Cat Familiar]

Hey I’m not BPD, but I needed alone time when I was dating my husband.

So this is something that would make you think about walking away from the relationship?

[Lucky Jim]

Hey neverever, If she is an Introvert like me, she may require time alone to regroup and recharge her batteries, which is no reflection on you.  Agree w/FF: give her the space and, in the meantime, plan things to do on your own that you enjoy.  Time apart can enhance the time together, in my view.

LuckyJim