CPS claim and the CE

[Thunderstruck]

Ok. For those who haven't heard me complain a thousand times, a CE was ordered for our case exactly two years ago. At first uBPDbm wasn't cooperating, but then the CE has since had personal troubles (divorce, child's health problems, and now her practice is getting evicted) which has delayed the report. Two. Years.   We are finally close to getting the report released.

On Saturday CPS called DH. They are investigating a claim from January that uBPDbm was forcing medicine on SD11 (my guess is that this claim came from the school). DH said to them that he does not have concern for physical harm, but there are a few strange instances in the past regarding medicines  (just last week SD11 told us that uBPDbm gives her sleeping pills when she can't sleep, and every time SD11 gets a cold uBPDbm claims it is "allergies" and gives her allergy medicine instead). DH told CPS that he believes uBPDbm has an undiagnosed personality disorder. They asked him a lot of background questions about her education, relationship with her parents, her jobs. When DH talked to CPS on the phone they had not yet talked to uBPDbm (she was out of town with SD11 picking up her older daughter to bring back to our state for a visit).

DH then alerted the CE and our L to these new allegations.

We honestly didn't think they would be a big deal and thought it would be quickly closed as "unsubstantiated". We figured that the school had to mandatorily report the claim, that CPS didn't think it was a big deal which is why they waited 6 months to investigate, and that when they go to talk to uBPDbm she is just going to gaslight and coach SD11 to make it seem like the claims were baseless.

The CE said she was going to "make some calls" and find out more information. She just sent a letter to our L asking if we wanted to wait to include these claims in the report (it would take at least a month) or if we should just release the report without them. The CE said "The allegations referenced are very serious in nature though; meaning if [the psychology group that works with CPS] determines that there are findings supporting the allegations, it could have the potential of substantially changing the outcome of the recommendations."

Does the CE know something we don't? What do you guys think we should do?

There have been numerous CPS investigations on SD11 regarding abuse allegations (on both sides, both DH and uBPDbm). SD11 has only once gone to see the psychology group that supports CPS and that was when DH was accused of sexually abusing SD11. Their findings were that uBPDbm was causing SD11 mental harm.      So if SD11 is going to see the psychology group then this must be pretty serious (unless the CE is just making that assumption?).

[Nope]

Ok. For those who haven't heard me complain a thousand times, a CE was ordered for our case exactly two years ago. At first uBPDbm wasn't cooperating, but then the CE has since had personal troubles (divorce, child's health problems, and now her practice is getting evicted) which has delayed the report. Two. Years.   We are finally close to getting the report released.

On Saturday CPS called DH. They are investigating a claim from January that uBPDbm was forcing medicine on SD11 (my guess is that this claim came from the school). DH said to them that he does not have concern for physical harm, but there are a few strange instances in the past regarding medicines  (just last week SD11 told us that uBPDbm gives her sleeping pills when she can't sleep, and every time SD11 gets a cold uBPDbm claims it is "allergies" and gives her allergy medicine instead). DH told CPS that he believes uBPDbm has an undiagnosed personality disorder. They asked him a lot of background questions about her education, relationship with her parents, her jobs. When DH talked to CPS on the phone they had not yet talked to uBPDbm (she was out of town with SD11 picking up her older daughter to bring back to our state for a visit).

DH then alerted the CE and our L to these new allegations.

We honestly didn't think they would be a big deal and thought it would be quickly closed as "unsubstantiated". We figured that the school had to mandatorily report the claim, that CPS didn't think it was a big deal which is why they waited 6 months to investigate, and that when they go to talk to uBPDbm she is just going to gaslight and coach SD11 to make it seem like the claims were baseless.

The CE said she was going to "make some calls" and find out more information. She just sent a letter to our L asking if we wanted to wait to include these claims in the report (it would take at least a month) or if we should just release the report without them. The CE said "The allegations referenced are very serious in nature though; meaning if [the psychology group that works with CPS] determines that there are findings supporting the allegations, it could have the potential of substantially changing the outcome of the recommendations."

Does the CE know something we don't? What do you guys think we should do?

There have been numerous CPS investigations on SD11 regarding abuse allegations (on both sides, both DH and uBPDbm). SD11 has only once gone to see the psychology group that supports CPS and that was when DH was accused of sexually abusing SD11. Their findings were that uBPDbm was causing SD11 mental harm.  So if SD11 is going to see the psychology group then this must be pretty serious (unless the CE is just making that assumption?).

This is a tough one. For starters, if the CE doesn't get the picture by now then she isn't going to. But I think she does. The problem is, can you live without the difference?

Meaning, lets say the report you get now will strongly favor your DH, but still give BPDm some visitation and still have the parents at 50/50 legal. Now lets say the report you get if CPS finds her at fault will give DH sole legal and BPDm's visitation will have to be supervised, is it then worth the wait?

A CE must have reasoning for every recommendation. Just knowing that BPDm is a horror show isn't enough. All that really gets DH is more time with SD11 because that's the only way he can reasonably have time with her. But, being a proven physical danger to the child is a whole different ball game. Since CPS has already found BPDm to cause SD11 mental harm, my thinking is that they are pretty on-the-ball. The wild card is SD11 successfully lying to protect BPDm and for there to simply not be enough evidence to support a claim. But if the school made a claim than CPS is going to take that much more seriously than either parent making a claim. And the school wouldn't get CPS involved on just a hunch.

[Lilyroze]

  Thunderstruck,

What a mess, shame it has taken so long for the CE.

Being that schools are mandatory reporters could be. Also CPS uses the school to have access to children in jeopardy, ( and doesn't have to tell either parent until after visit). Meaning something or someone could have mandatory or other wise reported( on top of medicine claim), and they used school for access point. Clue is they reach out to the parent that is not usually the problem to ask questions. Which has happened in your case. They can see your husband is right on top of things, and trying to be fair and balanced ( giving them infor about UBPDbm, and that he has been trying to be there and get help for years).

None of this is good for the UBPDbm at all, but especially not good for you SD11 and her well being.

So keep going as you are and will. Be the fighter for your SD11. I am not up to date with yours. Is there a chance for you to get full custody and visitation for the mom?

Seems like this will all come to a head soon. Good luck and keep fighting!

[Thunderstruck]

Like I said, this hasn't been our first rodeo. I think this makes the 7th CPS investigation regarding SD11.

Lilyroze you bring up a good point... .I was wondering why they would have sat on this for so long before investigating because they are required to touch base about every claim within 24 hours (I used to volunteer as a GAL so I have been trained on all this stuff). But they could have went and talked to SD at the school in January and we just never heard about it.

We currently only have a temp CO at 50/50 timesharing and joint legal. DH is requesting primary timesharing (uBPDbm would have Wednesday nights and every other weekend) and full decision making (medical, educational, and other).

DH is leaning towards waiting for the results of the investigation. It'll delay our report even further (boo) but the CE has stated that the allegations are very serious and could change her recommendation. When DH talked to the CPS investigator she said she couldn't really go into details about the allegations so there might be serious stuff in there that we don't know about. I thought it was kind of odd when the investigator was asking a ton of background questions about uBPDbm, like "How is her relationship with her parents?".

[ForeverDad]

My CE finished his report in about 5 months and only a little over budget.  It was given to the lawyers and they discussed it privately with the main judge, not the magistrate.  The summary included "Mother should immediately lose her temporary custody" but no action was taken except to schedule a settlement conference.  Meanwhile, mother raged at the pediatrician's staff and he mailed her a "withdrawal of services" letter.  A couple months later when the CE appeared for the Trial he submitted to the court his final report, never to be seen again because we settled, and I presumed it included her causing the loss of son's pediatrician.

Based on my experience, could this CE report be termed a 'preliminary' report that has the potential to be updated with subsequent information to 'final' if the case isn't quickly resolved?

[bravhart1]

The skeptic in me wonders if CE is just buying time. With all that's happened, shouldn't the CE have a pretty strong report against mom already?

If you just got the report, Then added CPS report, you could use both to ask for any version of custody that looks reasonable.

IDK what to think, but I don't like how quickly the CE jumped to delay. I think she has done a report and she's stalling. What a mess.

[flourdust]

I agree with bravhart1. I'd demand the report right away so you can move forward with legal proceedings. If you don't get the outcome you want in court, you can always circle back with new evidence.

[Thunderstruck]

Ok, we've dispatched the L to talk to the CE and try to get more information about the allegations. The L said "I don't want to give [the CE] anymore leeway... ." we're like yeah exactly, since it's been two years already. When the L talked to the CE previously, he had gotten the impression that the report was already in our favor. As Nope pointed out... .if there is physical harm then it could drop uBPDbm from something like weekend visits to supervised visits (not necessarily something we would push for) and from shared legal to sole legal (something we definitely want).

I guess mentally harming your child isn't as severe as physically harming them. Ugh.

[bravhart1]

The report should be coming soon, no? I feel like maybe she hasn't done it at all. And she's going to try to piggy back onto the CPS reports findings.
I hope your L was firm about not messing around and getting this done. Enough is enough

[Thunderstruck]

Ok, just heard back from the L.

The CE only knows what we know. We don't think this CPS investigation is going to be a big game changer (I mean, the allegation was made in January and they're just now getting around to looking into it?). So, we are going to go ahead and ask for the report to be released now, and if something comes up with this investigation then it'll be additional evidence in the case.

According to the L "CE indicated the report would be completed soon." But how many times have we heard that before? bleh.

[Panda39]

"According to the L "CE indicated the report would be completed soon." But how many times have we heard that before? bleh."

Since the eye rolling emoji is gone I brought my own  

[GaGrl]

Lawyer to CE... .

":)efine 'soon'."

[Thunderstruck]

Since the eye rolling emoji is gone I brought my own  

! Judge Judy eyeroll is great!

We have SD today so I asked her what the deal was. She said CPS didn't visit this week. When I mentioned the forced medicine she launched into this tirade destroying the character of uBPDbm's ex-bff (that was a whole hot mess). She's 17 and pregnant with a really old guy's baby and uBPDbm and her had a falling out over a trip they took together. I was like ok... .I don't care about this person's social life, point? Well I guess uBPDbm thinks it was the ex-bff that called CPS.

SD's narrative of what happened was that she was having an emotional meltdown and acting out. uBPDbm gave her a pill to calm her down. No idea what it was. SD said it was "children's medicine".

[Nope]

Either it was children's cold medicine to make her drowsy so she'd be quiet or it was something else not prescribed for her that can't be gotten over the counter. Either situation isn't a good one but there is no way to prove what it was or wasn't. BM certainly wouldn't tell CPS if she gave SD an Ativan or something.

I think you made the right move asking the CE to release the report. I hope your L asked her to recognize that you've all been hearing "soon" for more than a year now... .

[bravhart1]

Any chance you have gotten dag gum report?
  just checking in, thinking about you and your family.

[Thunderstruck]

Any chance you have gotten dag gum report?
  just checking in, thinking about you and your family.

Thanks for checking in!

Unfortunately it's been crickets. DH sent an email to the CE two weeks ago asking about a completion date and she never answered. He asked again last week and her answer was "I'll give you an answer later this afternoon". DH is going to send a follow up email again today.

I saw online that the CE's eviction case is now (as of Monday) closed by default (she never replied to the original motion so her landlord sent a motion for default that the judge approved). Soo, she's probably busy packing because her business is getting evicted. Oi vey.

[Waddams]

can you petition to have a new CE appointed?  2 years and still nothing but the same ongoing delay tactics from her is ridiculous.

[Thunderstruck]

can you petition to have a new CE appointed?  2 years and still nothing but the same ongoing delay tactics from her is ridiculous.

Ugh. DH and I don't have the money to pay for a whole other CE. This one was nearly 20 grand. And judging by the fact that the CE's business is getting evicted for non-payment of rent, if we asked for the money back there is a zero to heck no chance of us getting it.

[bravhart1]

I'm so sorry you have been let down. As a mental health professional and a trusted court advisor she has (had) a duty to complete your report in a timely manner or refund your money and excuse herself.  I hope you will look into filing a complaint with your states licensing board.

If not to get a refund on the monies she took for services she didn't render, then at least to prevent her from doing this to another family needing a good CE.

Making a report to the licensing board is free, and they may pursue a refund on your behalf (like a district attorney would do for the victim of a crime). No report she could give you now would hold up in court anyway it's much to long since she started. Also,you need not fear her giving a bad report because of the complaint, that is easy enough to show in court as well.

I hope you get some closure in regard to custody soon.  hows that baby?  

[sanemom]

I have been undercover for a while, but I thought I should come up and see if the report was here.  This is ridiculous... .I am not shocked anymore.  Maybe you will get it by 2020.

Love the Judge Judy eyeroll... .we really need that emoji back.

It is just time to get back in court with or without a report.

[Thunderstruck]

I'm so sorry you have been let down. As a mental health professional and a trusted court advisor she has (had) a duty to complete your report in a timely manner or refund your money and excuse herself.  I hope you will look into filing a complaint with your states licensing board.

If not to get a refund on the monies she took for services she didn't render, then at least to prevent her from doing this to another family needing a good CE.

Making a report to the licensing board is free, and they may pursue a refund on your behalf (like a district attorney would do for the victim of a crime). No report she could give you now would hold up in court anyway it's much to long since she started. Also,you need not fear her giving a bad report because of the complaint, that is easy enough to show in court as well.

I hope you get some closure in regard to custody soon.  hows that baby?  

I think we're still hesitant to bring the hammer, hoping that the CE will finish on her own. But it's looking like she is making us a lower than low priority (no response from yet another email asking about when it'll be completed).

The baby is great! He's perfect and loud and happy, standing up on his own and alllllmost able to walk. SD11 and him have started to bond (although she still gets jealous of the attention he gets). And we're expecting another boy in February. 

[Waddams]

Another idea - how about sueing the CE for non-performance of services?  she's been paid and has not delivered.

also, i assume she's professionally credentialed by some governing state board?  if so, maybe you can file a professional complaint against her license with the board?

waiting this long is ridiculous.  the kid is going to age out of the system before she completes it.  most licensed professionals are covered by some form of professional liability insurance.  i'm a licensed engineer - i have to have it in order to practice and use my seal to approve designs.  any judgement can be covered by her insurance if she can't pay herself.

sorry if this is getting too much into "fixer" mode, it's just that lots of people aren't aware of their options when dealing with professional services if said services aren't delivered.

[bravhart1]

Omg! That's so fantastic! Congratulations on the new, new baby!
Almost walking? Time does fly!

I agree with waddams, look into getting your money back, there is some policy out there protecting you from this. Call a halt to her report dragging out. No one would be able to fault you.

Everything going ok with BPDm otherwise?

[Thunderstruck]

Ok, DH called the CE today. She was "on the other line" so he didn't get to speak with her directly (only the receptionist).

Apparently the CE has a phone call set up with uBPDbm and the latest lie is that she expects the report to be completed by the end of next week.

So... .let's see how this pans out.

I talked to DH last night about what options we may be able to pursue (based on suggestions from you guys plus adding in should we talk to our L?). I think  he's hesitant because he feels like it would cost us more money and put us back at square one.

[Thunderstruck]

Omg! That's so fantastic! Congratulations on the new, new baby!
Almost walking? Time does fly!

I agree with waddams, look into getting your money back, there is some policy out there protecting you from this. Call a halt to her report dragging out. No one would be able to fault you.

Everything going ok with BPDm otherwise?

Yes I'm in the process of making two babies faster than the CE has made one report!

Things have been very typical lately, not smooth but nothing that really needs addressing. There has been feigned cooperation since we're getting the beginning of school logistics all straightened out, and the crage (crazy rage) messages have been at a minimum (only one accusation of stalking!).

[Nope]

Yes I'm in the process of making two babies faster than the CE has made one report!

That is crazy. I'm sure you heard nothing today. Could you go forward with asking for a hearing date and then making her explain to a judge why it isn't ready if it isn't ready by then? I'd really like to see this CE feed her excuses to a judge at this point. Plus waiting until after you get the report to file anything will just take up even more time.

[Thunderstruck]

CE responded to DH's email from last week. She said she has a final interview with uBPDbm tomorrow.

When DH was on the phone with the CE's receptionist, the receptionist said that the CE expects the report to be done at the end of this week. I'm guessing there's not much at this point that either of us could say to change the CE's opinion.

FINGERS CROSSED that this is the last hurdle and we can finally get this done!