Hi calledandchosen,
I'm so glad that you decided to post. I'm sorry to hear about your split from your husband. That must have been so difficult after 4 years together. I commend you for taking such good care of yourself and your children—embarking on a new chapter in your life was a brave step to take.
I really understand your moments of considering going back to your husband, especially when you feel peaceful and happy in your new life. I can relate, and so can many of our members. I think many of us, when we start to feel better, have the idea that we can better handle the issues that wrecked us before. I mean, we've learned a lot since then, right? Some of us might have done fine, but in my experience, the first time we realize that we are feeling better is not the time to go back in; I recommend more time and more recovery before attempting (if at all) anything of the sort.
I have been single since my breakup, too (4 years), and I feel great. I don't feel any pull whatsoever to pwBPD, however. I think that's because we live in different countries, are not in contact, and weren't together very long. Your situation is different, and I think your feelings are very understandable, especially when you have to have contact because of your son.
Have you had any therapy since your breakup, calledandchosen? I found that it helped me tremendously.
Keep writing and let us know how we can support you. As you may have noticed, this site has tons of tools and resources that can help you in the detachment process.
We're glad you're here!
heartandwhole
