Need help understanding CPS rules

[Freeagain2017]

Do you know if the kids therapist need to tell both parents that they plan to file with CPS and tell you the reasons, or only to the side that is suspected with the wrongdoing if custody issues involved?

[Turkish]

Who's reporting, the therapist? What specifically is reportable?

[Leaflet]

I know the rules vary from state to state, but I don't think that anyone has to be told if something is going to be filed with CPS. I think CPS does the telling. For example, I am a teacher and have had to report several things to CPS. CPS investigates the report, and then they come to a conclusion about the case and what should be done. Also, the therapist will know the rules, and generally, at least in my state, the person receiving therapy has to sign a form acknowledging that they know wrongdoing will be reported. I know that a report coming from a therapist will carry a lot of weight with CPS. If this involves the other parent in a custody battle, say as little as possible about all of it. Anything you say can get turned on you in a custody battle. The first thing a perpetrator will do is try to blame the other parent. Be careful, and good luck!

[scraps66]

My general understanding form a school district psychologist is that CPS getting involved does not help.  People protecting jobs.  A case with a BP involved would be well above the head of any CPS personnel's qualifications.

[Freeagain2017]

Sorry for not providing additional information. As a background... .
Thursday afternoon, kids' T told me he may need to report to CPS based on the information I and the kids told him. Strangely, he was more concern about the kids staying by themselves alone when STBXPBH takes them to trips rather than the emotional abuse.

I asked him not to report anything he heard from me unless the kids told him about it. He spoke with the kids, and told me after the session he will update me about his decision.
Thursday 7pm I received an email from STBXBPH saying the Kids' T spoke with him. I emailed the T asking what did he told him, how he received it and should I be concern (T is alcoholic and abusive).

STBXBPH returned at 11:30pm home drunk, broke things in the kitchen, threaten to hurt me physically. I called the police. They came but could not do anything since he only threaten. He denied everything and pretended he was asleep.

Friday 11am I finally received an email from kids' T saying that he will need to report to CPS, and it is SPO to inform both parents. He apologized for not providing other details saying he is in the process of completing the report and determining other details for the future of therapy. He also promised to contact me when decisions would be made (not sure which, maybe about the kids therapy).

Friday 4pm I received an email from STBXBPH saying he spoke at length with the practice (he did for almost an hour), and that I am included in their filing and I will be investigated as well.

I am horrified what he managed to convinced the T. I was thinking T relied on what the kids say, not what the parents claim against each other... .

I was just trying to understand why T spoke with him for so long, and never bothered to updated me as he promised. Also, how the hell he does not warning me that he told him - the guy is alcoholic and violence. After the police left, I ended up sleeping with my kids in the same room with the door locked just to make sure we are all safe (STBXBPH refuses to leave the house).L say I should not contact T, and just wait to see what we hear from CPS. The wait is killing me... .

In the meantime STBXBPH told the kids (7 and 10) that he is now in trouble b/c what they told the T and he may go to jail. How someone can do this to their own kids?

[Turkish]

Though there are mandatory reporting rules,  my experience is that there is a judgement call.  It sounds like the initial reason for reporting is neglect/safety on their dad's side.  I was on the verge of reporting my ex for punching her husband in front of the kids (two crimes: battery, and exposing the kids to violence),  but I had her verify she told her T the next day,  she admitted it to D4's T the day after that in apre-scheduled appointment with both of us present. The T said that she had to report it,  but the next day (after consultation with colleagues), decided not to. I won't hijack your thread by going into the details. 

It's probably scary that you will be investigated,  too, but it may not be much more than an interview. I sat in a room with a CPS worker over two years ago due to another incident (due to a family member on the other side,  and I reported),  and though it was voluntary on my part (I could have done it by phone,  but I chose to go to the office so they would connect to me as a person) I was extremely uncomfortable. 

What I see here as positive, is that you've been honest with the T (as have the kids), and it doesn't sound like you've tried to hide anything.  In fact,  the opposite.  You've been reaching out for help from professionals. As frightening as it must have been to lock yourself in a room,  you did what you could at the time to keep yourself safe. Though the therapy and the police call are documented,  it would be a good idea to document this on a journal or planner. You can back date 

It might also be a good idea to call a local domestic violence help line for ideas.  One,  because they can help you develop a safety plan; two,  because you can also document that you reached out for help.  It shows that you're exhausting all avenues in order to keep your children safe, which is what CPS will consider.  Personally, I'd call tonight. 

[Freeagain2017]

Just heard from the kids T that he cannot see the kids again because it is high conflict divorce. No kidding. Why did he think the kids going to him. I feel he betrayed the kids. No word about the CPS filing. No recognition that he put the kids and me in physical risk. Or that now the kids are wondering since STBXBPH told them he may go to jail because what they told him.
The T wants to see the kids one last time, with both of us.
Should I tell him that he put us in risk, and what STBXBPH said to the kids?
I am looking for a new T for them, but feel so betrayed, and have no clue what is the status of his CPS report.