estrangement

[Gamine]

my adult daughter who has BPD has recently had her third child. During her pregnancy and prior she has lashed out with verbally abusive texts when I, her mother, have not met her unreasonable expectations. Sadly, after meeting with her most recently, after being told that she and her husband no longer want to have a a part of their lives, she refused to consider seeing a family therapist to work on finding a way forward. I am posting this in hopes of finding some support from other parents, grandparents who are experiencing similar issues.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[KitKat68]

Hi,

We are estranged from our early 30’s daughter wBPD and have been for a few years now. Fully estranged with no contact, this time our choice to estrange with no plans to reconcile

Your post wasn’t very detailed, any particular aspect of this you’re seeking support from others on?
 

[js friend]

hi Gammie,

Iam so sorry that you are going through this.

I have now been estranged from my udd31 for 4 years. She has 3 children. The last child I know nothing about. I dont even know what sex the child is and I have made a point to purposely not asked about this new grandchild. not because I dont care or love this child, but because it is just too painful.

[Joyinrepetition]

I can really relate to this post. I have 2 adult step daughters, one has been diagnosed with BPD, the other I suspect maybe has BPD? Both are estranged by their own choice, the youngest SD I haven’t seen for 7 years, the eldest SD, it’s been about 13 years since I saw her. Did maintain contact up until a few years ago when she said some very hurtful things which are not even true, after which she cut off all contact. The sad thing is both of them have children, 5 between them,  and myself and my husband have only seen the eldest grandchild twice when she was about 2 years of age. She is now 15.

I am in contact with the youngest SD, who is currently really struggling with her BPD mental health and says she had a recent episode of psychosis. I keep reaching out to her via messaging, and try my best to keep in touch, but there are periods where she just does not reply. I understand this is common for BPD. I am hoping she will eventually feel well enough to see myself and my husband.