DBT and/or neurofeedback therapy for BPD???

[vegqueen]

Hello all,

My husband of two years is a veteran with both physical disability and TBI, as well as what I believe is BPD secondary to TBI (although he's never been formally diagnosed). He'll go through consistent cycles of being deeply in love with me/enamored with me, singing my praises and telling me how amazing and strong I am. After 2-3 weeks, almost like clockwork, he'll split in an instant and think that I'm a terrible person who's out to get him. Then he'll shut down and not speak to me for several days.

I've learned to cope as best I can and I try not to take it personally, but as you all know that's easier said than done. Living together makes it particularly challenging since I would prefer to give him complete space during this time.

My husband has recently started dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) as well as neurofeedback therapy. It's a bit too early to tell whether these new therapies are having an effect, so I was wondering if anyone else has experience with them? While I understand everyone's experiences will be different, it might help me to have some idea what to expect. I've read a few studies about DBT and neurofeedback for BPD but would prefer personal accounts if anyone is willing to share.

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[Pook075]

Hello and welcome to the family!  I'm so sorry you're going through this.

DBT is the gold standard for treating BPD since it's training on how to process feelings/emotions in a healthy way.  For example, if you get a random thought that someone is out to get you, DBT teaches you to stop and challenge that thought before acting on it.  Is there proof it happens that was consistently?  Can you think of one example where that didn't happen?  If so, take another breath....maybe it's just a misunderstanding you were going to over-react to.

I don't know much on Neurofeedback so I'll let someone else chime in there.  But for either process, the success depends on your husband's dedication to improving and getting past this stuff.  It is hard work because you have to face some truths about yourself that will be really uncomfortable, and the treatment usually lasts a few years total.