I'm getting the feeling she will be back

[Gear Jammer]

I get gut feelings usually when I do it happens.

My ex BPD and I have been apart for 2 years we've only seen each other twice in that time face to face, she's blocked me on social media she claims seeing me makes her feel ill, she said I really hurt her.

She's moved out of the area a month ago, the corporation she works at couldn't give her the hours to survive on,  she transferred to another division in the town where her BF lives. Its cheap rent for her when she was on her own 70% of her income went to paying rent.

I don't see her lasting very long in her new job position I give it 2-3 months she will start fighting with her new coworkers she's a control freak she loves bossing people around. She's tried working in another division in the same town she got run out of that division. All her previous jobs she's had she's fought with her employees and they ended up hating her. The job position she left she worked alone so it worked out for her she didn't have to deal with other coworkers on a regular basis.

I just recently found out the woman that replaced me when I worked for the corporation doesn't like her job she wants a transfer. This woman is nuts as well I have a feeling she's a BPD she's got the traits of one. She wants a transfer bad and she will do anything to get one it may take 2-3 months she will get the transfer she wants. This will leave an opening for my ex she can apply for the job and get it if she wants it. She's been hanging on working at the corporation for 4 years working part time trying to land a full time job. She will move back to the area if she can get a full time position.

Hearing the fact there will quite possibly be an opening at my ex's previous point of assembly I'm preparing myself for the ex moving back to the area. I was a little sad she left the area a month ago but now I've had some time to think about it I like the idea of having a 200km buffer zone.

My ex is a high functioning BPD so she does handle things fairly well she doesn't handle change very well. She needs to have her life planned right to the minute she carries a day timer she knows what she's going to do right down to the minute.  I'm seeing her new job position and living with her BF not working out she's a month into it I give her another couple months the atomic bomb will go off. She gets overwhelmed really easy the stress level goes through the roof and she ends up having a mental break down because she can't process what's going on around her.

I'm preparing myself for her possibly trying to find me again I was hoping her moving out of the area would put my mind at ease she's gone for good. More I read about BPD I don't want to ever see her again.

Why do we get involved with BPDs, I keep reading they will haunt you for the rest of your life. When I left my BPD "she had feelings for me" when I cut her off she claimed I hurt her feelings.






Once she gets a opportunity to transfer she will it may take 2-3 months but she will be gone. My ex could apply for that job and win it, will be a full time career she's been hanging on for the last 4 years waiting to get a full time career in the corporation.

I don't see this new change my ex has made working out, she's tried living with her BF once before, she got so mentally stressed she had a break down. She's tried working in other divisions of the corporation it didn't work out. She can't handle stress when things get stressful she folds like a deck of cards. Her BF isn't going to handle her he will pull a gun out the cabinet and put a bullet through her head. He's so mentally stressed from dealing with her for the last 3.5 years he will lose it.

I'm preparing myself for her

[marti644]

I hear you, there is always a return. I had an ex gf who I had an on again off again relationship with for 5 years. Didn't realize till my recent experience that she exhibited many of the BPD signs. Every few months I hear from her and never though much of it because I lost interest long ago. But she is still trying to connect. Very persistent.

[hopealways]

Yes they do return and we do take them back often, but you WILL reach a point when you are just SO over it.  Mine happened when I heard scandalous stuff about her past involving cheating behavior. I never went back and did not care about her after that either.

[Gear Jammer]

I don't think I would take her back I'm really worried she would go even more ape chit than she did before. They say BPDs don't get close to people, the one I was with she seemed to have fairly strong feelings.

My ex was a high functioning BPD you wouldn't ever know there was something wrong with her unless you were close to her anybody around her has no clue what she's truly like.

She needs her current BF so she can use him it was her whole goal was to get with him and use him. Now she's moved in with him so she could take another job, I have a feeling living with him will push their relationship to destruction.  It is a toxic relationship that is for sure it is much more toxic than the relationship we had. I set boundaries with her she was surprisingly submissive with me she new she couldn't push me around.

I will be curious if she will come crawling back when she finally gets tired of the guy she's with, as I said I get a feeling this will be the year their relationship implodes. The last time I see her face to face she was so nervous around me all I got out of her was giggles.

[marti644]

Gear Jammer,

I had a similiar experience. She could only really attack me when she was texting or on the phone. I have pretty strong boundaries in person; I got the giggles too! Weird. I have no thoughts of getting back with her, just healing and moving on. This forum has helped me to realize that they never change, and I am not equipped to deal with those specific types of problems.