New Here

[Broke down]

I've been struggling for years now with my wife thinking that I may go insane some days. Only recently things got so violent that I had to seek help with a counselor to here this new word "BPD". I'm in the middle of reading a book she suggested "walking on eggshells". I think this author has been living with me righting about my life. My wife has since stopped going to counseling. Not sure where to go from here. I'm new to this diagnosis. 

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[johndude49]

Hi Broke Down,

So sorry to hear about your struggles with your wife.  Welcome to the club.  After describing my wife's behavior to my counselor about 5 years ago, he recommended I read "Walking on eggshells".  It nailed the problem and I am convinced that my wife has this condition--though she is completely unwilling to see a counselor to find out why she's having so many emotional struggles with me and many others.  I have since read it about 4 more times.  It helps me to read someone who understands what I'm going through.  I get the insane feelings.  I have had and still have them.  Through reading, counseling, and lots of prayer I've been able to live a normal life, have moments of peace, and even stay in the marriage--even though she still does crazy stuff we have some boundaries and she knows some things I won't put up with anymore--angry rages against me or hours of constant complaining about me and others--and when I tell her I'm going to leave the house or I'm not coming home until she promises not to go off again, she will "usually" honor my request to stop her behavior.  The book has guidelines to follow and they really help.

I'll tell you more about my situation if you want to know but for now I just wanted to encourage you that you've come to the right place that has many who are going through what you are going through and a place that has answers and ideas for how to cope and survive.  Best wishes to you.

[heartandwhole]

Hi broke down,



I'm sorry to hear that things have gotten so bad in your relationship. That is so difficult, and I can understand feeling that you are going insane sometimes. It can be very hard to see things clearly when we are deep in a situation. 

You mentioned that there is violence in your relationship and that you are going to counseling. I'm so glad you reached out for support and help. That is very important.

Could you tell us what is happening at home? What behaviors are the most difficult to handle? Have you contacted local resources (e.g., domestic violence helpline) for advice?

Keep posting and sharing. It really helps. We're here for you.

heartandwhole