My daughter is 30 has BPD and in single mom of a 2 child

[db64]

Hi this is my first time but would like some help my daughter is age 30 has been diagnosed with biopolar and BPD... She is a single mom of 2 boys ages 6 and 2 this has truly been a roller coaster of a ride for both myself and my husband. The last 4 months she has been in and out of treatment center with little help. 2 weeks ago she took pills because she said she would be better off not here. She was put in the hospital for 10 days and now doing out patient therapy I I'm so confused I can't think straight... What kind of help should we also try when she get out  she gets out of out  patient treatment she does have a psychiatrist and a psychologist and we have set her up an appointment with a BPD  specialist. She Has been staying with us afraid to be alone with herself and her boys she said she'll be lonely is it ok to let her stay for a bit or are we making it worst by letting her stay... I no they say that BPD is the feeling of abandonment,loneliness but when is it time to say you need to move on or is that not what you tell someone with BPD. Please any help will help

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Lollypop]

Hi there db64

Welcome to the forum. I'm glad to meet you but sad to learn what's brought you here. You've come to the right place. There's many in the forum who have grandchildren so there's understanding here.

The dx of any mental health illness is devastating to the whole family, it takes time to digest it, process it. My DS was dx at 24 and felt his situation completely hopeless. He's since been re-dx as BPD traits and GAD - he responded positively this time but I found it difficult. I want to say that it's very early days for both your daughter and yourselves.

I encourage you to read about BPD (as much as you can). This will help you understand your daughter's dx and also her limitations. I found the more I learned, the less I reacted which was a key factor to getting some calm. Once armed with this knowledge you can learn some skills that will help you more effectively interact with your daughter. There's a lot to take in and it can be overwhelming. Take your time and recognise that you need to take care of yourself so you can be there for your two grandchildren.

Baby steps. It's important your daughter feels that you are emotionally supporting her, not necessarily trying to fix the situation. Sadly there's no quick fixes but there's hope. This forum has saved my family.

Hugs to you.

LP

[db64]

Thank you I know I have a long road ahead... Doing a lot of reading and trying to stay positive...