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Author Topic: Facebook again... one big game?  (Read 623 times)
insideoutside
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« on: June 19, 2017, 10:13:21 AM »

Following on from my previous post I decided to block my friend again as I want no way I can contact him for him to threaten me with harassment charges. Within 2 days of blocking him his account disappeared (I monitor from a 2nd one).  Well sod me he is back on Facebook again with the email address I blocked.  Why doesn't it stay blocked?  Is this a damn game to him to delete so he effectively gets unblocked and sneak back on where I'm not aware of it til I notice again.

I don't understand how Facebook doesn't keep him blocked.  Surely it should remember or does deactivating take off the block?
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Rayban
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« Reply #1 on: June 19, 2017, 10:30:48 AM »

It is a game indeed. My advice is to stop playing.  It's also a game you will never win. Only you know if you want to detach. You won't do it playing facebook tag with him. You're feeding his ego, showing him you're still attached.  Not to mention the pain you're causing yourself by having a second profile to check up on him.
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insideoutside
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« Reply #2 on: June 19, 2017, 10:40:55 AM »

It is a game indeed. My advice is to stop playing.  It's also a game you will never win. Only you know if you want to detach. You won't do it playing facebook tag with him. You're feeding his ego, showing him you're still attached.  Not to mention the pain you're causing yourself by having a second profile to check up on him.

Yeah I know; but why doesn't he stay blocked?  I'm blocking him, when he deactivated he falls off my blocked list but when he reactivates he's no longer blocked?  Or is he deleting it and creating a new one?  I didn't even know you can delete your profile? 

I block him so I'm not tempted to contact him.
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insideoutside
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« Reply #3 on: June 20, 2017, 09:23:47 AM »

This is ridiculous; he's set up yet another account now after I blocked two yesterday.

I'm assuming his abandonment fears are kicking in but this is bordering on plain weird.
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« Reply #4 on: June 20, 2017, 09:35:38 AM »

this is a bit of a game of whackamole on both sides.

my suggestion? dont react. leave it be.
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insideoutside
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« Reply #5 on: June 20, 2017, 11:34:06 AM »

this is a bit of a game of whackamole on both sides.

my suggestion? dont react. leave it be.

It may feel like that OR but when he said he was going to call my husband and cause problems the last time we spoke I'm also trying to protect him locating him on Facebook too .  Even though everything is locked down he can still see comments and likes on cover photos etc.

Guess if it doesn't stop I'm going to have to deactivate my account.
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« Reply #6 on: June 20, 2017, 01:20:29 PM »

the threats are concerning. the thing is, if hes creating accounts to get around your blocking, that suggests its a reaction that hes looking for.

it may deescalate things not to give that to him, and if he tries another method (he might) we can tackle that.
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     and I think it's gonna be all right; yeah; the worst is over now; the mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball…
insideoutside
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« Reply #7 on: June 28, 2017, 04:08:13 AM »

And yet another profile has appeared; this is the 4th one.  Instead of blocking I sent a message asking if he was doing it on purpose to get my attention and if he wants to speak to me to just speak.  Message stayed unread until I deleted it this morning.

I'm so exasperated with this; why keep making profiles and not respond to a message.  Maybe it's not for my benefit but it coincides shortly after I block another profile.

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happendtome
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« Reply #8 on: June 28, 2017, 06:20:16 AM »

So this topic got me triggered and i went to see my ex and my replacements facebook profiles, which are both private. But there it was - this "featured photos", with them, happily together. As i understand this "featured photos" is always public and you cant hide it. Clearly, i see it wasnt by accident they did it this now. They have unfriended their ex-s and friends, but they still want them to see how happy they are. So here it comes - featured photos.
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insideoutside
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« Reply #9 on: June 28, 2017, 06:29:04 AM »

So this topic got me triggered and i went to see my ex and my replacements facebook profiles, which are both private. But there it was - this "featured photos", with them, happily together. As i understand this "featured photos" is always public and you cant hide it. Clearly, i see it wasnt by accident they did it this now. They have unfriended their ex-s and friends, but they still want them to see how happy they are. So here it comes - featured photos.

Yeah its one big game and to show everybody how 'happy' they are.  This goes for regular people too, some of my friends included who I have had to unfollow due to their narcissism.  I never put anything on featured photos, I literally have my cover photo and profile picture (set to friends only) and no information about me or my life that any old joe blogs can see.  

I've deactivated my account for a few days because its stressing me out.  He never really uses Facebook (claims to hate it and be bad for his mental health) and only ever has a profile picture and no information/friends etc. so don't know why use keeps coming back on it after deleting it.  He now has 4 profiles and only one with a picture on.  Its like he doesn't want to be in contact with me because of the hurt I caused him but can't bear the fact I block him so he can't see me on facebook. I guess its the attachment thing in full force but its seriously stressing me out. 
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