Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
April 25, 2025, 07:46:44 PM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Experts share their discoveries
[video]
99
Could it be BPD
BPDFamily.com Production
Listening to shame
Brené Brown, PhD
What is BPD?
Blasé Aguirre, MD
What BPD recovery looks like
Documentary
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
Denial of the exBPD
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: Denial of the exBPD (Read 430 times)
Lost-love-mind
a.k.a. beezleconduit
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 207
Denial of the exBPD
«
on:
September 24, 2017, 05:46:36 AM »
My exBPD told me over a month ago in a vile email, after an apology I sent, that there was never any friendship or anything close to love.
Yesterday I was notified via email by a background check company (exBPD applied for a new job before breakup) there was a response to my observation. I assume the file was reactivated due to her reaching the end of probationary period of her new job (3 mo ?).
Initially, the background check company contacted me shortly after the breakup of the relationship and I told the computer questionnaire that I used to date her. It asked me what was the reason for the Break-Up and I told them that she was what I thought "emotionally challenged". I thought that was a pretty open-ended statement that could be interpreted in many ways and was not negatively vile.
Turns out someone else contacted them and said that they were surprised that someone she was "close with" in her past would say something negative.
I'm surprised the background check company would even update me via email unless it is a computer robot that tracks initial commentary?
Anyway, how do I reconcile the "we were never friends or close to love" with this update?
It makes me wonder if she has softened her position on our short 2 mo. r/s?
Am I close to getting some closure from her?
This development has really messed with my head again after I was thinking that I was over her.
Still finding my exBPD fills my head too much.
Logged
I'm a pwBPD traits, diagnosed.
Skip
Site Director
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 7054
Re: Denial of the exBPD
«
Reply #1 on:
September 24, 2017, 11:25:38 AM »
Who knows what this is about but I don't see a win for you here.
It might be best to stay out of it. You have no obligation to respond and in many ways, I personally think asking one partner why a relationship failed is invasive (just an opinion).
Logged
Lost-love-mind
a.k.a. beezleconduit
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 207
Re: Denial of the exBPD
«
Reply #2 on:
September 24, 2017, 02:13:24 PM »
I agree. It was just an impulsive post on my part because I'm confused.
Closure on my part was accomplished by reviewing reasons why I stayed attracted to such a woman with so many questions in her past. I'm cleaning my side of the street, so to speak.
Reviewing her potential change of heart and turning me "white" again, I would doubt due to my initial breakup emails asking about her past were rejected as intrusive. They probably were, but she was married to a high profile musician that has an underground music scene social footprint the size of Bigfoot.
I speculate much of her behavior at the end of our relationship (bdsm sexting and talk of drugs) due to an 9 yr. marriage to a drug abusing and philandering man that evaporated any true possible intimacy from her heart.
I should be grateful she turned me me black .
Logged
I'm a pwBPD traits, diagnosed.
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
Denial of the exBPD
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...