Hey M&T, With your kids in college, they are old enough to make their own decisions about their r/s with their father, I assume, so I would encourage you to avoid triangulating between your kids and your separated H. Let them work it out, is my advice. Having empathy for your separated H shows your kind nature; on the other hand, suggest you avoid taking on the role of care-taker for him.
LJ
Good points.
My college kids live at home, so we talk at meals when they're around. They read the email to me, and my only request to them was to maintain boundaries. They told me later what they sent.
When my husband emailed both times, I told him not to complain to me about our young adults and left it there.
Thankfully he has family several hours from where he is now. If something major comes up medically, he'll go stay close to them.