How do you deal with not seeing your grandkids?

[LifeinOZ]

I posted a few weeks ago that my stepdaughter told us she didn't want us in her life. The most painful part of this is we have 3 grandchildren. They are 3, 5, and 13. I cannot imagine what she's telling them to explain why we aren't coming to visit or having them sleep over at our house.

Any thoughts for coping?

Your own experiences would be most welcomed.

THANKS in advance!

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[abcdefg1]

Dealing with the same thing with my DD. No ideas just huge. Every time we want to come or want her to come it'doesn't work for her'. She doesnt repond to calls or texts, except days and upt o weeks later. She has never said she wants us out of her life but because she has BPD we are guessing that is what she is doing...  

[NannaM]

This is so sad. Grandparental Alienation is a world wide epidemic. Like "blocking" or "un friending" on FB. And the innocent victims are the grandchildren.  Maybe there is a meeting of Alienated Grandparents Anonymous in your town? Good support in a meeting, and loads of information, articles and videos on their website. So sorry you are going through this.

[LifeinOZ]

Thank you! I've never heard of Alienated Grandparents Anonymous! I spent a little time on their website today - VERY helpful. Thank you!

[HockeyDad10]

We are also facing this situation. Our BPD son is no longer with the mother of his son but due to his issues she is limiting and restricting when we can see our grandson. Since he lives with us she thinks this is ok. Meanwhile our grandson is very upset and does not understand why he cannot come to our house. We miss him terribly. We know he misses us too. Using children as pawns is never ok.

I had not heard of "Alienated Grandparents" before - but this is certainly how we feel.

[BillyHage]

I see your problem! Yes, sometimes it happens when your stepdaughter decides instead of you! The only thing is to establish a good relationship with her! www.bigpaperwriter.com/ might have more recommendations on this difficult issue.