Difficulties living with adult child with issues

[Mistella]

I am looking for a group therapy type platform. My 26 yr adult daughter has recently move back home due to a break up from three states away. While I am relieved to have her home to provide her help we have many challenges. I was quite comfortable in my empty nest. Her younger sister, who just got a big girl job and moved to her own place is very pleasant and easy to be around. My older daughter was in a 2nd degree burn accident 11/2 years ago and has since been diagnosed with panic disorder, ADHD, PTSD, OCD and depression to go along with anxiety disorder that was already diagnosed.  It has also been mentioned she may have high functioning female aspergers. I have read and google so many things with so many symptoms crossing over it’s overwhelming. And I believe it could be BPD.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Speck]

Welcome, Mistella!



Please allow me to welcome you to the discussion boards. I'm sorry for the struggles that you face with your adult daughter, but I'm glad you're with us. We help and support each other here, so that's what you should expect.

I lurked here for a while before feeling compelled to become a member, and I'm so glad that I have. It sounds like you are having an especially difficult time right now, but I hope that you will stick around and receive the support that you need.

Thank you for sharing what you have thus far:

I am looking for a group therapy type platform.

I have read and google so many things with so many symptoms crossing over it’s overwhelming. And I believe it could be BPD.

I hear you. As you most likely know, only a trained specialist can diagnose BPD, but I think that you'll find a lot of parallels here - lots of members (including me) have similar stories. Yes, a firm diagnosis can help loved ones feel better by knowing that the odd, hurtful, and confusing behavior has an actual name, however, in my view, it's the behavior that's the problem. And, it sure sounds like her behavior has been a problem for you. I am so sorry for that.

Yes, you are on the right track. If you look up to the left of your screen under our logo, you'll see these words: "Facing Emotionally Intense Relationships." From what you've shared thus far, I would think that your relationship would fall into this category, so just know that you're absolutely in the right place. And we're so glad you're here.

Please tell us more when you're comfortable doing so and feel free to make yourself at home. You are among peers.

Keep writing, keep processing, keep learning... .


-Speck

[Lollypop]

Hi Mistella

I just wanted to say Hi and welcome.

My son returned home at 24 following a crisis - it was a challenge to know what to do for the best. I joined this forum, got reading about BPD and it helped me to not react to him. He was in such a highly emotional state and it took a change in approach to get him more stable. He’s got BPD traits and GAD - as times gone on (he’s 27 now) I focus on his behaviours now rather than any dx. He found the dx very difficult to handle - it hindered him as he felt his situation hopeless but helped me because I found help here if that makes sense.

He moved out last Oct and lives on our lane so keeps close. He’s functioning and finding his own way to live happier, despite the problems.  Me too.

Hugs to you. I remember I felt so overwhelmed. Baby steps and a lightness of touch is needed. I encourage you to read first and then learn new ways to interact - regardless of any dx they are skills that can work.

I’m very sorry you’ve got it so tough but things can get better.

LP