Hello All,
My younger daughter was diagnosed with BPD in 2006; however, since that time she and her husband have decided that she does not fit the criteria. She related this to me after the birth of my grandson because a social worker paid them a visit in the delivery room. I retired early and relocated so that I could become my grandsons caretaker when my daughter went back to work. I know, you don't have to tell me that I am a co-dependent. So is my son-in-law, he is the superman of co-dependents so my daughters extreme overreactions and controlling behaviors are always, without exception, supported and rationalized. Is there anyone else in this situation that could provide me a swift kick to the head?

The most recent incident involves a platonic male friend who is coming to visit me this weekend. My daughter met him when packing up my last house. I wanted him to meet my grandson, his father, and my first ex-husband (Grandpa) who will also be in town for a meal or perhaps an outing. This request was met with accusations that I was only doing it because Grandpa was in town, that her expectations would be for me to have no contact with them, and that she gets to decide who meets her son. She is right about the last one but this also extends to my inviting over my grandson other Grandma during his time here or contact with any of my friends. I feel this is rejecting and restricting. She also spoke for Grandpa and my oldest daughter telling me that they would prefer if I were not always there when the come for a visit. Despite the fact that I knew she would be like this going it still hurts. Any words of advice?