Things haven't changed with the new guy.

[AustenJ]

Stop me if you have heard this one... .two guys walk into a bar. One guy goes into the restroom leaving the other guy to sip his beer at a table... .when guy comes out of the restroom, guy sipping his beer is sitting with my BPDexgf and her soon-to-be fiance. I'm thinking, "why didn't my buddy text me while I was in bathroom?" And of course, I left my phone on the table. Duh.

I introduce myself (of course, he knows who I am) and actually have a relatively nice discussion with her boyfriend. My buddy and I and my ex all work together; my buddy who knows our past history and is recently divorced spends his time chatting up my ex (wanting to get in on some of her impulsive, reckless sex) while
I'm stuck talking to her boyfriend who is oblivious to her flirting with my friend and her shooting me goo goo eyes the more she drinks.

Like most of her exes (dozens) he's a nice guy. He's balding, soft, and stutters. Totally not what I expected. She's a former triathlete and high school/college track star... .all of her exes have been fit up to this point, so a physical departure for her who places so much stock into what she looks like and who's she with. In fact, she had a girlfriend bestie who was slated to be the maid of honor in her wedding to this guy who commented to my ex that her 33 year-old boyfriend had a "dad" body. I'm sure she also commented on his baldness and stutter too... .needless to say, she is no longer in the wedding, not getting invited to the wedding, has been ostracized by his friends and hasn't been heard from since.

When the boyfriend got up to go to the restroom, she put her hand on my inner thigh, which I quickly removed as i noticed my buddy stroking her thigh under the table. I asked her why she was still waiting on the engagement ring that was promised 6 months ago; she was candid in saying that she has to get into counseling first before she gets the ring... .so there it is. Things haven't changed with the new guy. He can't fix her either. She still cuts, drinks to blackout, rages, purges and cheats. And she will drop out of counseling... .again.

I enjoyed talking to her boyfriend. He's truly a nice guy... .just like me... .and most of her other exes. Will she ever get that engagement ring? Will she ever move with him to his new job? I still hope for her happiness; and I pray that she actually moves out of state with him like she plans; it will make things so much easier for me not having to see her every day and having my colleagues and friends trying to screw her.

I can still have compassion towards her boyfriend and even her as long as that compassion does not pull me back into any type of relationship with her. And I know her current relationship most likely will end in a train wreck also. He has much more invested in their relationship than I did, so it will be really painful for him. I have no worries resisting her when she tries to recycle me. She's broken, and she she breaks other people. I actually see her boyfriend being the one that ultimately reaches out to me... .after the train wreck.

[Lucky Jim]

Sad stuff, AustenJ.  In my view, there's nothing you can do to prevent the train wreck.  It seems like you have disengaged in a healthy way, which enables you to see what's really going on.  Suggest you keep removing her hand from your thigh!

LuckyJim

[gotbushels]

Thanks for the entertaining read AustenJ   

I have no worries resisting her when she tries to recycle me.

Yes. Good on you.