Introduction and Looking for Local Support Group in Los Angeles

[PunchedMom]

I'm naming myself Punched Mom because I feel like a punching bag to my 15-year-old daughter. We are new to this potential diagnoses after suffering from our daughter's Dr. Jeckyl/Mr. Hyde personality, lying, splitting, arguing over EVERYTHING, being super sensitive, attached to me at the hip and yet using me as a punching bag many times a day. For at least two years.
I just can't take it anymore.
Hoping to enroll her in an intensive outpatient DBT program for teens - the call has been made, just waiting to get her enrolled. Hoping that will help all of us as this includes weekly parent/family therapy sessions.
The cost of the DBT out-patient program is exorbitant and I wondered if anyone knows of free resources in Los Angeles that might help as well. We are doing it regardless of the cost. We are desperate.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Feeling Better]

Hello PunchedMom

I would just like to welcome you.

I’m sorry, I am in UK so am unable to offer any information regarding free resources in Los Angeles, however, I’m sure that some of our other parents in a similar situation to you will be able to offer advice.

In the meantime, if you want to take a look around the site I’m sure that you will find lots of helpful information, especially in the TOOLS and LESSONS that can be found on the right hand side 

Once again, welcome, and we look forward to hearing more from you x 

[Radcliff]

I'm sorry to hear of the difficulties you are facing, but am glad you've found us.  This is a good place to learn tools that can help you cope.  When I first saw that you were looking for resources, I thought you meant resources for you, so I wanted to mention this program:

https://www.borderlinepersonalitydisorder.com/family-connections/

DBT is a tremendous program.  I think you're making the right call by prioritizing and making it happen despite the expense.  You might consider ordering some DBT books (perhaps Linehan's workbook) online so you can better understand and reinforce the curriculum.  Does the program your daughter may enroll in have support resources to educate families?

WW

[Merlot]

Hi Punched Mum

I just can't take it anymore.
We are desperate.

So many members arrive here feeling exactly the same way and often arrive here at a point of crisis.  BPD is relentless and being the target of their rage and accusations is extremely debilitating.  I've learnt so much in the last six months that I have been coming here from wonderful input from parents. 

I think it was Lollypop who first helped me to understand that it is not personal... .and for me, learning to understand that, started to make it a little easier.

I am currently reading a book by Rachel Reiland: Get me out of here.  It's her personal biography about recovery from BPD.  I'm half way through and it has really helped me to understand the grief and challenges they have in arriving at a normal space; such is the insidious nature of BPD.

So I'm glad to here that you are looking for DBT opportunities, and especially as a minor, you will hopefully have a say in attendance.

I am from Australia, so I cannot help make a recommendation.  Please look after yourself, this is a long journey and you will need resilience as much as your daughter will.

Keep coming and sharing, there is so much value to be had in talking with other parents. 

Merlot

[Daisy123]

Hello Punchedmom,

So sorry to read about your daughter. My DD just signed herself into RTC that focuses on DBT. It’s a short term residential with a 6 week PHP.

Wentoworth mentioned the Family Connections program. I’ve just finished their 12 week course. It was excellent. A group of us have continued to meet face to face.

Family Connections has various meetings around the country.
Though I’ve not taken any classes from NAMI, I know a few who have and found the classes helpful. I will say that the support and readings available on this site have been so helpful to me. I’ve learned a great deal from this site and received support in some truly challenging struggles.

I hope all goes well for your daughter and her treatment plan.

Daisy123