Please help My BPD husband turned my son against me

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hello families,
This is my first message to this group. We were married, divorced and remarried to the same person believing he was changed. We have another daughter too after the second marriage to the same person. I was wrong. I wasn't aware of the disorder by then. Now my BPD husband took complete control over everything including my son. My BPD husband turned my teen son completely against me by brainwashing him that I am trying to destroy the family. My husband is making my son mentally sick like him. My son is willingly allowing my husband to abuse him and go against me if I try to rescue him. The dad and son are not willing to take any counseling either. They both are saying I have mental illness. How can I explain and rescue my son from this situation? My son is strongly against separation again for his baby sister.

Thank you,
v

[Vm.win03]

Hello families,
This is my first message to this group. We were married, divorced and remarried to the same person believing he was changed. We have another daughter too after the second marriage to the same person. I was wrong. I wasn't aware of the disorder by then. Now my BPD husband took complete control over everything including my son. My BPD husband turned my teen son completely against me by brainwashing him that I am trying to destroy the family. My husband is making my son mentally sick like him. My son is willingly allowing my husband to abuse him and go against me if I try to rescue him. The dad and son are not willing to take any counseling either. They both are saying I have mental illness. How can I explain and rescue my son from this situation? My son is strongly against separation again for his baby sister.

Thank you,
v

[pearlsw]

Hi Vm.win03,

What are the ages of the kids and do you have any way to get the kids into family counseling? These kinds of things are not easy to undo I think without professional assistance, and even then it can be a big uphill climb.

Can you describe more about how and why your husband did this?

with deep compassion, pearl.

[Harley Quinn]

I'd like to join Pearl in welcoming you to the site.  Are you still married and what is the state of your relationship generally?  I can imagine how awful that has to be for you, having experienced some degree of parental alienation myself.  If you are all living together that has to be really hard.  Maybe you can give us a little more of your story so that we can understand how best to support you.

You've come to the right place, and it's great that you reached out for support.  What other support do you have?  Have you sought any professional advice?

Love and light x      

[Mutt]

Hi vm.win03,

 

Id like to join the others and welcome you to the family. I’m glad that you decided to join us. Welcome!

Maybe you can give us a little more of your story so that we can understand how best to support you.

Im sorry that you’re going through this. I’m going through something similar now, can you tell us what your son is saying and doing? How is your H influencing your son?