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Author Topic: So many of us in crisis and pain right now  (Read 427 times)
bluek9
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 257


we are full of color


« on: September 07, 2018, 11:25:35 AM »

Hi everybody,

   Bluek9 here checking in after a few days after the nuclear meltdown. I thank everyone for all the support and hugs.  Welcome new member (click to insert in post) I can't tell you all how up lifting it can be to the battered spirit to come here and receive hugs and understanding. 
   My D has actually amazed and surprised me by stepping up to the situation. She has stopped the B**ching and been compliant to helping me around the house. Part of this includes getting my grandson on the school bus in the am at 645. My dad is taken care of, but my mom is still suffering a great deal of pain daily. Now tomorrow I will have to be dealing with my brother who cleaned out her checking account and wants to move his new girlfriend into her house.
OH CRAP!  Cursing - won't cause site restrictions at Starbucks (click to insert in post) Some how it will all work out.
   I wanted share also what I notice here on the board,, so many of us parents are in crisis right now. I have read so many other threads of parents who are struggling and in deep pain right now. One of the newbies posted "I hope someday to help others here" (paraphrased). My gosh, I answered her that she is already helping just by sharing her story.    I love this place, it is where I come to find solace, support and understanding   I'm not sure why so many of us are in crisis, it could just be the nature of BPD, it could be coming off the full moon, it could also be that a lot of us are just worn out. What ever the reason, I know and want to share with others that this place is the place for all of to be right now. I find that acceptance comes from understanding. The more I understand myself and my needs, the more I can accept my own limitations. Which helps me accept my D and all her needs. Love and support to all the rest of you who are tired right now   
 
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   H:healing, O:options, PE:positive encouragement
Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
wendydarling
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Relationship status: Mother
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« Reply #1 on: September 07, 2018, 05:38:50 PM »

Hey bluek9  Welcome new member (click to insert in post)

Yes, checking back in after the nuke  Frustrated/Unfortunate (click to insert in post). You are a diamond   I'm right there with you, when our parents health finally fails, upon us, emergency measures to put in place ain't straight forward and it is emotional so I understand your DD melting down and in her regulated time responding and supporting you, when she is able, means so much to you, connecting   Go you and your girl  

Like your Dad, we homed my Mum (92) in a care home in July, it was the right time, and right place.  Our family home is now empty. Do you have power of attorney to manage your parent's affairs? (Wow I'm fixing again!).

I hope your Mum heals, is out of pain, soon.

Wishing you and all bright days  

WDx
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Be kind, always and all ways ~ my BPD daughter
bluek9
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 257


we are full of color


« Reply #2 on: September 08, 2018, 08:34:12 AM »

Thanks WDx,

       So good to hear form you. Boy are you RIGHT, the situation is not straight forward and to say emotional is an understatement. Siblings who are not on the same page just add to all emotions. And NO I don't think your question is fixing; it goes straight to the heart of family matters and facts that must be addressed. I do have power of attorney for both of them, and take care of all matters, will, property, finances; of course this is what pisses off the sibling. Thank you so much for the well wishes, I made mom go for a short walk yesterday, don't want or need pneumonia setting in. I'm thankful for this time of year here on the coast, days are sunny 65, and you can feel fall just around the corner.   thanks WDx
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   H:healing, O:options, PE:positive encouragement
Merlot
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« Reply #3 on: September 09, 2018, 07:00:38 PM »

Hi bluek9

Im amazed that you are still standing and so coherently after the meltdown and still ongoing crisis. You are being hit from every angle. No wonder you are battle weary.  Hang in there, sounds like you are chunking it off brilliantly.

I cant say how sorry I am that you're going through all of this and in particular your brother. You must be so angry with him. Thats just so sad.

My mother is 79 and Im very lucky that she is currently well. Im hoping Ive retired by the time she needs critical care.  Im the only girl and I know my 3 brothers will expect it of me to care for her when the time comes.

Look after yourself bluek9. Thinking of you and hope your Autumn is a calmer time for you.

Merlot
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